vipentul
Jan 1, 2019
Writing Feedback / Many people are treating pets as their own family member. [4]
I am hoping for the feedback of following writing. It was my first attempt in writing for IELTS. So, hoping for the honest feedback.
Many people are treating pets as their own family member. What are the problems and their solutions?
Parents in numerous families consider domestic animals, as their own children. This essay will discuss about the fundamental issue associated with such ubiquitous way of behaving pets as family and suggest its relevant solution.
People definitely will have atrocious psychological effect after the loss of their loved ones. In a similar way, people with great attachment toward their pets are expected to have same effect. People often keep pets for the good companionship and eventually, end up being too emotionally attached with them. The lifespan of most common pets, particularly of dogs and cats, is considerably less than that of humans. It is therefore, most likely that people will face the loss of their pet in their lifespan. As a result, people tend to suffer from different mental illness and even lack acumen in doing general work. For instance, many psychologists are having regular patients frequently suffering mentally from the death of their pets.
The principal solution to this harmful problem may be keeping more than one pet at a time or preferably of different genders of same breed. This not only can have opportunity of having young ones if different sexes were allowed to mate but also help people to cope with the situation when one of the pets sadly dies. People, these days, are practicing of having 3 or 4 pets, mostly of different breeds or species to have better security of fellowship.
Therefore, getting too emotionally attached with pets is the main problem of treating them as family, which can be solved by having more pets than having only one pet. Hence, it is somewhat innocuous solution to the problem which otherwise can have violent effect on one's psychological state..
I am hoping for the feedback of following writing. It was my first attempt in writing for IELTS. So, hoping for the honest feedback.
Many people are treating pets as their own family member. What are the problems and their solutions?
getting too emotionally attached with pets
Parents in numerous families consider domestic animals, as their own children. This essay will discuss about the fundamental issue associated with such ubiquitous way of behaving pets as family and suggest its relevant solution.
People definitely will have atrocious psychological effect after the loss of their loved ones. In a similar way, people with great attachment toward their pets are expected to have same effect. People often keep pets for the good companionship and eventually, end up being too emotionally attached with them. The lifespan of most common pets, particularly of dogs and cats, is considerably less than that of humans. It is therefore, most likely that people will face the loss of their pet in their lifespan. As a result, people tend to suffer from different mental illness and even lack acumen in doing general work. For instance, many psychologists are having regular patients frequently suffering mentally from the death of their pets.
The principal solution to this harmful problem may be keeping more than one pet at a time or preferably of different genders of same breed. This not only can have opportunity of having young ones if different sexes were allowed to mate but also help people to cope with the situation when one of the pets sadly dies. People, these days, are practicing of having 3 or 4 pets, mostly of different breeds or species to have better security of fellowship.
Therefore, getting too emotionally attached with pets is the main problem of treating them as family, which can be solved by having more pets than having only one pet. Hence, it is somewhat innocuous solution to the problem which otherwise can have violent effect on one's psychological state..