Undergraduate / I found out firsthand just how dangerous snowboarding could be. UCF: "bump in the road" [4]

I used this essay for comp, and i want to shorten it instead of doing a new one. this is about 620 words and i only need 250. please help me shorten it. i'm thinking about taking out the tricks and such, but i don't know what else. thank you

snowboarding made me experience some pain

Snowboarding has been one of my favorite things to do ever since I was young. I first learned to snowboard when I was six years old in Liberty, Maryland. The highlight of my year has always been my family's annual ski trip. Constantly pushing my limits has made snowboarding exciting, but also very dangerous. In January of 2006 I found out firsthand just how dangerous snowboarding could be.

Ever since I was young, I have been snowboarding every year and have a lot of fun. My dad and I go all across the U.S. to several different ski resorts every year. Although my dad sticks to bunny hills, I generally like more of a challenge. Testing my limits made me much better and allowed me to have as much fun as possible. In the past couple of years, I have started doing tricks off of jumps and rails. Two years ago I learned how to do an indy grab, as well as a tail grab and nose grab. Last year in Colorado, I also learned how to 180 off of jumps and onto rails. As I get better, the normal slopes become more and more boring to me. Therefore, I end up going faster and into the tree trails, regardless of the consequences.

On January 26, 2009 I found out the hard way that snowboarding can be a really dangerous sport. My dad and I were in Aspen, Colorado and had only been there for two days. While my dad was in a meeting, I went on a few runs by myself. It was about 2pm and I was still snowboarding on my own. I thought it would be a good idea to snowboard where I was not allowed. I was going way too fast on a very narrow and ungroomed path with trees on both sides. With no way to slow down or stop, I hit a bump and went straight into a tree. I hit the tree with so much force that it broke my left femur. In shock, I yelled out for help. A few minutes later, a kind man heard me and called for an ambulance.

Not long after breaking my leg, a snowmobile came and escorted me to the ambulance and then to the hospital. I felt terribly scared and alone in the ambulance by myself. My dad was following in the car behind us. When I arrived at the hospital, the doctors removed my boot and prepped me for surgery. After what seemed like hours, I was sent into surgery.

Afterwards, I was told two metal rods had to be put in my femur instead of a full leg cast. I remained in the hospital overnight and was dismissed in the morning. My dad and I left the next day and returned to Florida. A few months after my first surgery, I had another to get the metal rods out. Despite the metal rods being removed from my leg, I was still not able to walk for several months. Not long after my second surgery, I began physical therapy. Even though the therapy hurt, I kept attending the rigorous sessions knowing that it would help my leg in the long run. It took many long, painful months, but I have recovered full strength in my leg. Although I was not able to walk for a while, I was grateful it was not worse.

To become better and better at snowboarding has been my main goal from the start. A speed bump like this has only slowed me down. I will not give up something I love because of an accident. I still have tons of fun, but I know now that there is a limit on what I should do.

Writing Feedback / Friction Between Roommates Draft [4]

This is my draft for comp. i could use some help with editing. Please help. Thanks

Friction Between Roommates

Moving out of a home where one has lived their entire life takes a while to get completely used to. Fitting in to a completely new environment with a roommate, such as a college dorm, can be challenging and uncomfortable. Also, finding the perfect roommate is nearly impossible. Roommates will always have quirks that will be hard to get used to. Although living with roommates can be an amazing experience, there are several causes of friction, including: clashing personalities, bad habits, differing backgrounds, and religions.

One major reason for quarrels between roommates is conflicting personalities. Although college is for learning, some students choose not to take their education as serious as others. Roommates that differ in work ethics can become a problem to each other. For example: if someone in a college dorm that is concerned about schoolwork is sharing a room with a student that only enjoys partying then problems may arise. Also, someone with a very outgoing personality may become very annoying to someone with a much more calm, laid-back personality. Another reason for conflict is the times in which people go to sleep. A student wishing to study tends to like quiet rooms with minimal distractions, but some roommates may not respect their study habits. Actions, such as staying up late, can make a roommate frustrated. With several different personalities, it is very hard to be matched with someone easy to get along with.

Another reason for friction among roommates is the differing backgrounds from which they may have came from. Someone from a bigger family with a couple of sibling may treat people differently than an only child or someone used to living in a single parent household. An only child may be used to their parents spoiling them, however, someone from a large family may be used to working and doing things more independently. The transition on an only child moving out will be much more challenging than others. Students coming from families with siblings will be more used to living with people, especially if their siblings are within a couple of years apart.

A roommate with bad habits is most definitely a nightmare to anyone living with him. There are many bad habits, many of which are very minor, that can cause many unnecessary conflicts. Being untidy while living with someone can cause conflicts very easily. Small things, like leaving dirty clothes lying around, can really get a cleaner roommate angry. Other things like hygiene may create issues. Also, a student might like music or television while studying but their roommate may not.

Another major reason for friction is religion. Mixed religions in the same room most likely create problems in communication and living with someone in general. A Christian in a room with an atheist may cause a lot of arguments about theology and everyday values. Many people take religion seriously and if they become challenged, they will defend what they believe in, no matter what. The differing ideals of different religions will make everyday talk very difficult so that no one gets offended.

Some people may be lucky enough to share a room with someone who always gets along with one another, however, not everyone is this fortunate. The reality is that most people will be paired up with a roommate that will be hard to get along with. There are many types of personalities, which make it easier for two opposites to share a room. Also, differing religions and lifestyles may create communication issues. Even though a lot of friction may occur with roommates, it is worth spending one's college years living with someone.