Writing Feedback / Whether people should choose high paid jobs that they dislike or low-paid jobs that they enjoy. [4]

It's a fantastic essay but I'd change a bit the way the last sentences are written. "not only have less opportunity of promoting" "being promoted" would sound better in this case and also "suffer from job-dissatisfaction" sounds a bit strange to me, I'd say "experience job dissatisfaction"

Writing Feedback / Ielts Task 2: advantages and disadvantages of economic development. [5]

I would change a bit the wording of the sentences. To be more specific:
...nation's think that economic progress can enable them to reach their goals
...disadvantages is because sellers focus too much on-> is the fact that sellers...
but rarely get along with their family-> and they rarely spend time with their family
make a dramatic decrease in figures of unemployment-> it can dramatically decrease unemployment... ratesi
infrastructure and facilities such as roads, schools, hospitals,-> I would omit the word facilities
friendly with the ecosystem-> environmentally friendly