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Posts by kevinzultaf [Suspended]
Name: Kevin Zultaf Husein
Joined: Nov 13, 2020
Last Post: Jan 21, 2021
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: Indonesia
School: University of Brawijaya

Displayed posts: 2
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kevinzultaf   
Jan 21, 2021
Writing Feedback / (coffee and tea purchases) - WRITING TASK 1 - TEST 1 (CAM 15) [3]

From an overall perspective INITIALLY (Its better than buy words), ... largest percentageS in total ...
Brisbane and Adelaide isARE less ...

... at cafés.HENCE/THUS, ... people in Sydney the former area (avoiding repetition) are ... which is BEING about ...

..., FROM 50% to 53% of ... which is SHOWING around 15% ...
... constitutes BECAME the highest ...

Notes:
- reduce for using too much the words of "which is", its better if you use another option.
- Overall, you have wide range of grammars and vocabularies
kevinzultaf   
Jan 21, 2021
Writing Feedback / The maps illustrate tourism facilities in some island before and after constructed by the developers [2]

an island, before and after the construction



The maps illustrate tourism facilities in some island before and after constructed by the developers.

Overall, more and more buildings are added, and the accommodation became main focus in that area to encourage visitors. Also, the trees are not disappeared by them.

When it comes to the western area, there are established 6 new buildings as new accommodation for tourist after the designers finishing their project, and the coconut trees as well as the previous in the center of those constructions. Hence, if tourists want to go to the beach, they can using pavement facilities as their direction, and it seems that after reconstructing, visitors can swimming in the shoreline are.

Moreover, Restaurant and Reception are built by the architectures in the middle islands where include vehicle way for visitors, and also the travelers who use the boats can directly to the former building, while those line connect with pier in that an island. In the eastern side, more and more hotels are developed, and they coconut trees are not eliminated from that an island.



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