Undergraduate / "the banana peel" - Common App: Significant Experience [5]

Here Is My Essay. This is my first time writing a college essay and would love any feedback I can get back. Thank You!

Blacking out, bleeding and naked, in the middle of the desert was the least of my worries. The sun was beginning to set, and the only thing fighting off the overpowering feeling of helplessness was the incoming surge of adrenaline through my veins. If I didn't finish my shelter while there was still light, I knew I would have to spend the next ten hours shivering to stay alive. As I rushed to gather the pine needles for my bed, a cold wind surged and nipped at the back of my damp, crimson matted hair. A smile spread across my face, this is exactly how summer should be spent.

I enrolled in the Boulder Outdoor Survival School to see how I would react mentally when pushed beyond my limits. I think that the true measure of a person is best seen when they are outside of their comfort zone, and those with genuine strength of character are able to persevere. Back home I had a warm bed and a climate controlled room waiting for me, but I knew if I stayed there I would only be cheating myself. I had never truly broken down before, and I felt that if I didn't strip my walls down, I would never be able to rebuild them, stronger than before.

One week before I blacked out, I sat in the corner of camp and watched as the other students readied themselves for bed as the second day of the trip concluded. The only thought going through my mind was how I can leave this trip and get back home as quickly as possible. Holding back tears, I gagged myself trying to throw up, hoping the guides would end my misery and send me home. It was only the second day of the trip and I felt as though I had already been defeated. It was at this moment that I realized why I had come on this trip. I had successfully been broken, but would I have the strength to build myself back up? I looked around for a sign, a signal that I was going to make it through this trip, and the next day, I found it in a banana.

For the first 72 hours of our trip, we were not allowed to eat any food, except for the grasses and berries we passed by on our daylong hikes. On the end of our third day, our guides surprised us with a bunch of bananas. Henry Thoreau discusses the experience of starving in his book Walden and he quotes Thseng-tseu saying, "one looks, and one does not see; one listens, and one does not hear; one eats, and one does not know the savor of food" (218). As I held the banana in my hand, I felt like weeping, never before had I been so happy to see food in my life. The banana symbolized the beginning of my rebuilding, and I knew that I could take on the rest of the course.

While my friends back home slept with roofs above their heads, I marched through fields guided by moonlight, constantly pushing towards my final destination. With every new hole I carved into my belt, I knew that although my stature was shrinking, my character was stronger than ever. I had jumped off 20-foot cliffs and combated hypothermia with others' body heat, but never before had I succeeded alone. No matter how far I fall, or how daunting the challenge, I will persevere, and I have the banana peel to prove it.

Undergraduate / 'The Revolution and Conflict class' - Intellectually Engaging Experience Short Answer [3]

This is my last question before I finish my application so I would greatly appreciate any feedback! Please don't be afraid to tear it up

Thank you to all that respond :)
QUESTION: Stanford students are widely known to possess a sense of intellectual vitality. Tell us about an idea or an experience you have had that you find intellectually engaging:

The first day of our Revolution and Conflict class, our teacher walked into the room and asked us if we agreed or disagreed with the statement, "History is written by the victors." Even though I had heard this claim before, I had never truly thought about the fact that everything I have ever read in a textbook had come from the perspective of the winner. I felt betrayed. Had everything I knew about American history been a lie, or would history have still been remembered in the same way regardless of who wrote it? With the help of my teacher, I began to seek out literature that was written by those who had lost the war instead of those who won it. The book that resonated the most with me was When Heaven and Earth Changed Places by Le Ly Hayslip, a story about the Vietnamese War from the perspective of a Vietnamese woman. This book was profound for me because it showed the war from the perspective of a Viet Cong woman in which the Americans were the enemy instead of the other way around. I had never before read a book from the perspective of the "enemy" and enjoyed how I was able to form my own opinions about the Vietnam War after being exposed to both opposing sides. I think that the practice of history only being written by the victors cheats students out of forming their own opinions. Although it is idealistic to think that history will always be retold from both perspectives, I think that history is much more interesting when the victors aren't always the good guys.