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Mar 3, 2023
Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 2: Socializing online or meeting one another in person? [2]
Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person?
It is true that a number of teenagers choosing socialising online rather than communicating directly. There are a number of reasons behind this phenomenon and several solutions should be adopted to improve the situation.
There are two main reason why the young opt for meeting online. One reason is that it is cost-effective. By creating a account in social platforms such as Facebook, Instagram or Telegram, which is free in most cases, teenagers would put aside an amount of money. The money saved allow them to invest in themself, including broadening their horizons and diversifying their daily intake, in turn creating their value. Furthermore, online meeting provides the young with a sense of privacy. There are numerous introverted people who are tend to be reserved and always want to isolate themselves from the society. When attending a virtual conversation, they could express their true identity and become whomever they want to be with less fear.
Fortunately, several measures could be taken to prevent this problem. The first solution would be setting a higher price for the Internet service. This would make the teenagers change their behaviour towards this platform as they migh not be able to afford this service due to the limited allowance from their parents. A second measure would be the facilitating from the communities. Parents need to give advice and example on how essential it is to have a real network and interaction for their future as they have the most influence on their offsprings.
In conclusion, it is clear that there are various reasons for the tendency of teenagers engaging in virtual meeting rather than face-to-face contact and steps need to be taken to tackle this problem
PLEASE GIVE ME THE FEEDBACK AND THE IELTS BAND SCORE OF THIS ESSAY. THANK YOU VERY MUCH
Studies suggest that many teenagers these days prefer socialising online to meeting one another in person.
Why do you think this is the case? What measures could be taken to encourage teenagers to spend more time meeting one another in person?
It is true that a number of teenagers choosing socialising online rather than communicating directly. There are a number of reasons behind this phenomenon and several solutions should be adopted to improve the situation.
There are two main reason why the young opt for meeting online. One reason is that it is cost-effective. By creating a account in social platforms such as Facebook, Instagram or Telegram, which is free in most cases, teenagers would put aside an amount of money. The money saved allow them to invest in themself, including broadening their horizons and diversifying their daily intake, in turn creating their value. Furthermore, online meeting provides the young with a sense of privacy. There are numerous introverted people who are tend to be reserved and always want to isolate themselves from the society. When attending a virtual conversation, they could express their true identity and become whomever they want to be with less fear.
Fortunately, several measures could be taken to prevent this problem. The first solution would be setting a higher price for the Internet service. This would make the teenagers change their behaviour towards this platform as they migh not be able to afford this service due to the limited allowance from their parents. A second measure would be the facilitating from the communities. Parents need to give advice and example on how essential it is to have a real network and interaction for their future as they have the most influence on their offsprings.
In conclusion, it is clear that there are various reasons for the tendency of teenagers engaging in virtual meeting rather than face-to-face contact and steps need to be taken to tackle this problem
PLEASE GIVE ME THE FEEDBACK AND THE IELTS BAND SCORE OF THIS ESSAY. THANK YOU VERY MUCH