Posts by Vivace

Vivace

Nov 29, 2009

Undergraduate / Two month adventure to Naranamoozhy, Significant Experience Essay [3]

"The language problem was solved as my dad's translating service translated everything clearly except embarrassing stories that pertained to him. "

"Even the language problem was solved because of my Dad's translating service which translated everything clearly except when it came to embarrassing stories that pertained to him."

Aren't these repeats of the same idea?

Furthermore, you might want to expand on the main idea in the second paragraph and state the "catalyst" of your change more clearly.

Your conclusion should basically point out the impacts that ammachi made on you based on your previous statements.

Vivace

Nov 29, 2009

Undergraduate / My life-long dream of becoming a doctor; Education/Career Goals/Reason for major [2]

Prompt:Please state educational and career goals and the reason for choosing your
major.

It is my life-long goal to become a doctor, someone capable of saving and helping others in ways that not possible with other careers This is most likely due to my past influences and experiences by my parents, leading to my chose of Pre-Medicine as my major. To obtain that goal, I need to have the necessary education and training offered by a high-level university and then through a specialized school.

While I was in elementary school, my parents and grandparents would always usually be at work. Not knowing what "work" was and curious as to their day job, I asked to come along one day. It was there that I discovered that they were doctors, helping patients with injuries, pains, and problems on a daily basis. Surprised and awed by their work, I attempted to come along when I could, observing their procedures and actions at various people. Throughout my experience there I noticed one constant pattern: people came unhappy or pained and eventually left happily or satisfied, whether in one day or in a week that result was the same. Though it might sound naïve, I saw this as my parents giving people happiness when they were in pain. It was this childish ideology that led me to choose my life-long career in medicine.

After obtaining a bachelor's degree in a field close to medicine in the next four years, I plan to enter and succeed in a refined medical program. The knowledge that I will acquire during that time will help me help others not only superficial but also emotionally through words and actions. It is through that program, I will be in a profession dedicated at helping extending people's lives and bringing happiness. Though policemen and firefighters have the same career objective, they focus more on protecting others from harm and others. It is through medicine that people's lives can be prolonged, injuries healed, and the heart healed.

It is that sheer fact that I would be able to help another person's life, driving me into pursing the medical field. With my passion and desire, I aim to become someone capable of helping another through pain and grief.

Any input or advice would be much appreciated