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Posts by swim2011
Joined: Aug 30, 2010
Last Post: Sep 3, 2010
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swim2011   
Aug 30, 2010
Undergraduate / "swimming is so much more than a sport", Common App - 150 words or less answer [9]

This is me explaining my most meaningful activity for the Common App short answer - right now it's 151 words. I feel the first half is sufficient, but that the second half is rather lacking...any suggestions/criticisms please? thanks (:

To me, swimming is so much more than a sport. It is my way of life. I live for the pool with all its chlorinated glory, and for the past seven years, the YMCA has been a second home and family to me. Six days a week, sixteen hours a week, my lungs burn at practice as my body screams for me to stop but my minds yells louder for me to push through. This daily routine has taught me that hard work and determination lead to the fulfillment of goals, a truly life-lasting lesson. But more importantly, the sport has given me the true definition of teamwork. My teammates push me past my limits in practice and cheer me on as I achieve my goals. Without them, I would not be the accomplished swimmer I am; they are my closest friends and the reason why I swim.
swim2011   
Aug 30, 2010
Undergraduate / "Sibling Class" - Something you do for the pleasure of it [9]

so it has been really special for me to be a part of this.

Changing "really" to "truly" sounds more sophisticated.
But wow, 100 words is so short - and I thought 150 was hard to manage!
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