Unanswered [7] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by megangaller
Joined: Nov 26, 2010
Last Post: Nov 26, 2010
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 2
sort: Oldest first   Latest first  | 
megangaller   
Nov 26, 2010
Scholarship / Doctor, biology: educational, career goals, reason for choosing your major [2]

prompt: Please state educational and career goals and the reason for choosing your
major

For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to become a doctor, someone capable of preventing and alleviating pain and suffering in others. As a child, I naively thought that I could just grow up and become a doctor. My eldest brother also wanted to be a doctor so when he went away to college to major in Biology I was thoroughly confused and surprised. I began to wonder what I would major in when I went to my 4-year university. Every break my brother would come home with stories upon stories of all the amazing things he was learning and experiments he was performing. I realized that I wanted to follow in his footsteps and major in Biology. To me, Biology is the perfect major before attending Medical School. After obtaining my bachelor's degree in a field close to medicine, I plan to attend a refined medical program. The knowledge that I will acquire during the next four years will undoubtedly help me throughout medical school.

My goal is to graduate summa cum laude with my bachelor's degree in Biology in the hopes of of attending a renowned medical program to become a Doctor of Medicine. Within my career, I would like to open up my own practice. I would love to call my own shots so I can make my patients experience in my office pleasant. Seeing people cured and healthy in the shortest amount of time possible makes me feel accomplished. I love brightening another person's day. I know that being a doctor with a background in Biology would be the best means to live the life I have always wanted.

ANY help/advice would be greatly appreciated. even for grammatical errors. PLEASE HELP!
megangaller   
Nov 26, 2010
Scholarship / "Not only politicians, but also business people" - Leadership Characteristics [3]

Hi! I dont think ill be much help but i have a suggestion :)

i was always taught to steer clear of vagueness so maybe you should reword "among other things" and "and various revolutions"

idk if you should delete them completely or just change them to more detailed examples. i think you might be fine with the second fragment i pulled out but i know that i have seen people use the first fragment and its frowned upon.

sorry that was just grammatical help. as far as content, i think its great. especially the modern entry of steve jobs which people will be able to relate to!
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳