Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by mh00912
Joined: Dec 11, 2010
Last Post: Dec 29, 2010
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From: United States of America

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mh00912   
Dec 29, 2010
Undergraduate / Game + Golden Advertisement + Curriculum - Notre Dame [12]

1. The Grotto is a cherished destination on Notre Dame's campus, a space that invites students and visitors to pray and take time for reflection. Do you have a place that you seek out, and what do you contemplate there?

I like how you let the reader into this comfort zone of yours. It is personal but i don't feel intrusive. Great job.

2. What is one small detail in the world that you notice and wish others did, too?
This is quite long so and it is only supposed to be around 150 words so can someone help me shorten it please.


... small bag of popcorn in the other hand . Battling through the mass of legs to the only vacant seat, i finally get situated.Believing the hard part is over, I go to place my drink in the cup holder only to realize they are both taken. Oh no, now I have two options, I canholding my drink for the next one hundred minutes or asking one of the strangers next to me to switch cup holders. Just as I go to ask, I wonder, at a movie theater,(we already know you're at a movie theatre so you don't necessarily need that) which arm rest is mine? Being right handed, I would automatically assume that the right arm rest is, but that logic fails if the person next to me is left handed. Thinking harder, I wonder if there is some perfect formula that would always prevent this kind of situation from happening.I don't think this sentence is critical especially if you're trying to cut down the wordcount.

... I may be stuck holding my slushy for the next one hundred minutes. After five more minutes of pondering, my neighbor to the right offers to move his drink and my problem is solve. Even though I do not have to hold my drink to the entirety of the film, I wonder if maybe after the "turn off your cell phone" warning and the "silence is golden" advertisement, if maybe they should also add anclear answer to which arm rest belongs to whom.

For the last one i would definitely talk more about the course itself. You probably don't want to potentially end up sounding like "I would love to teach this course because stealing is fun and interesting to me." :P But if you continue to talk about the coursework you could go more into the history of stealing (biggest heists and things) and how technology has changed theft. Is it safer to keep your money in cash in a safe or in a bank and why? Just food for thought!

Hope this helps.

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