walcotted
Jan 1, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Graham' - Brandeis - Common App Essay - Significant Person [6]
Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence. (500 words)
I haven't seen one of my good friends in a while. He knows where to meet. I stroll into the neighborhood coffeehouse. I order a scone to share but I wolf it down myself. He never had much of an appetite anyway. I do all the talking in between bites.
Not much has changed since we were little. He is still the same polite, reserved boy I once ordered around; I am still the same impulsive, aggressive girl, though to a lesser degree. I remember when we first met. I was five and my best friends were my mother and the television. I created Graham to combat the bitter loneliness brought on by my lack of friends. I wish I had a good reason for it; I wish I could tell you I was an only child, I lived out in the country, or my parents were overprotective. But, I was just bossy, tactless, rude, and in desperate need of a friend.
Enter Graham, the four-foot tall, gap-toothed answer to my prayers. Exceptionally agreeable, a willing scapegoat, and even gender versatile; everyone else's "real" friends paled in comparison to Graham. When confronted about my mother's prized and freshly trampled geraniums, Graham was there, ready to accept his fate as I shamelessly threw him under the bus. If our game of house transformed into a level one trauma center and I needed a nurse in the operating room, Graham was also there - only this time with his hair secured in a bun.
But as I grew older, games alone were not enough. I craved reciprocation; I wanted an engaging, three-dimensional friend. So I developed mannerisms, tics, even a favorite color for Graham. Soon the silent interactions evolved into full-length conversations. For the first time, I was forced to consider how my words and actions would affect another person. As my ability to empathize with others drastically improved, so did my self-esteem. Of course, imaginary friends are mainly designed as lesser versions of their creator - I was far superior to Graham. My friend tempered my competitive nature with his lack of one, which let me develop an increased sense of worth in myself and in my abilities.
With time, others began to view Graham less fondly. Once endearing, my teachers now found it disturbing and distracting. Even my parents grew tired of setting the table for the figment of my imagination. After I transferred schools and made "real" friends, Graham disappeared shortly thereafter.
Graham could not alter my quirks and antics, but he did hone the best of them to cut the mom-and-television crystallized cocoon I had lodged myself in. He took my worst traits and made them more bearable. Looking back, I realize I did not create Graham only to compensate for my lack of friends but to also be the mentor who would guide me to finding friends instead of making them up.
A stranger asks if the seat is taken. I start to say yes. She looks perplexed but moves to leave. I remember myself and call out, "Wait! My friend just left."
I am open to all criticism! Please, give me feedback about syntax, diction, grammar, etc. Be harsh! Will gladly return the favor.
Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence. (500 words)
I haven't seen one of my good friends in a while. He knows where to meet. I stroll into the neighborhood coffeehouse. I order a scone to share but I wolf it down myself. He never had much of an appetite anyway. I do all the talking in between bites.
Not much has changed since we were little. He is still the same polite, reserved boy I once ordered around; I am still the same impulsive, aggressive girl, though to a lesser degree. I remember when we first met. I was five and my best friends were my mother and the television. I created Graham to combat the bitter loneliness brought on by my lack of friends. I wish I had a good reason for it; I wish I could tell you I was an only child, I lived out in the country, or my parents were overprotective. But, I was just bossy, tactless, rude, and in desperate need of a friend.
Enter Graham, the four-foot tall, gap-toothed answer to my prayers. Exceptionally agreeable, a willing scapegoat, and even gender versatile; everyone else's "real" friends paled in comparison to Graham. When confronted about my mother's prized and freshly trampled geraniums, Graham was there, ready to accept his fate as I shamelessly threw him under the bus. If our game of house transformed into a level one trauma center and I needed a nurse in the operating room, Graham was also there - only this time with his hair secured in a bun.
But as I grew older, games alone were not enough. I craved reciprocation; I wanted an engaging, three-dimensional friend. So I developed mannerisms, tics, even a favorite color for Graham. Soon the silent interactions evolved into full-length conversations. For the first time, I was forced to consider how my words and actions would affect another person. As my ability to empathize with others drastically improved, so did my self-esteem. Of course, imaginary friends are mainly designed as lesser versions of their creator - I was far superior to Graham. My friend tempered my competitive nature with his lack of one, which let me develop an increased sense of worth in myself and in my abilities.
With time, others began to view Graham less fondly. Once endearing, my teachers now found it disturbing and distracting. Even my parents grew tired of setting the table for the figment of my imagination. After I transferred schools and made "real" friends, Graham disappeared shortly thereafter.
Graham could not alter my quirks and antics, but he did hone the best of them to cut the mom-and-television crystallized cocoon I had lodged myself in. He took my worst traits and made them more bearable. Looking back, I realize I did not create Graham only to compensate for my lack of friends but to also be the mentor who would guide me to finding friends instead of making them up.
A stranger asks if the seat is taken. I start to say yes. She looks perplexed but moves to leave. I remember myself and call out, "Wait! My friend just left."
I am open to all criticism! Please, give me feedback about syntax, diction, grammar, etc. Be harsh! Will gladly return the favor.