Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by Lomstein
Joined: Feb 3, 2012
Last Post: Feb 6, 2012
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
From: Faroe Islands

Displayed posts: 4
sort: Oldest first   Latest first  | 
Lomstein   
Feb 3, 2012
Undergraduate / Is English my own? (why I love English better then my own language - Portuguese) [4]

Hey everyone, I am new here. I am applying to an undergraduate program. Could you please give some input to my essay?

____________________________________________________
Is English my own?

When I am asked to explain why I love English better then my own language (Portuguese), I quickly run to the wise words of Derek Walcott:

"The English language is nobody's special property. It is the property of the imagination: it is the property of the language itself. "

English has always been a passionate escape of my imagination. Since I was a little girl, I was able to imagine stories and fairy tales in foreign languages. It gave me a wonderful feeling of having a magical and mysterious world, created by words only. I love words. Writing, speaking and reading have always been the best ways to express myself. I found out that there was something that I was good at and loved doing. I rediscovered myself over and over again when presented with the challenge of written or spoken words. When introduced to English in school, I immediately fell in love. Though having been born to a country of two languages (Creole and Portuguese), I had no problem adapting to this new way of communicating. I owned it. It never made me feel less Cape Verdean or less patriotic for choosing a different language to call my own. Whenever I wanted to say what I felt, it seemed easier to do it in English. It meant more and it defined my emotions clearer.

My interest for English grew stronger throughout my secondary studies. I could easily imagine myself teaching English or using it at a more frequent basis in the future. For a long time I have been planning to continue my studies and finally be able to finish what I started. After graduating High School in Cape Verde, I had many different choices for a higher education. One that attracted me the most was English Studies at ISE (Instituto Superior de Educaçăo). The study programme was exactly what I wanted. It gave me insight into the history of teaching English, the different methodologies used through the years and the language structure itself. Learning how words are formed and pronounced the way they are, made me even more aware of the fantastic journey I was embarking within the English literature.

While studying there, I was able to volunteer for a 14-day-programme onboard the MV/ Logos II ship that was visiting my country in 2000. It was the second time (The first time was during High School, when I was giving the opportunity to represent Cape Verde at a UN Youth Conference in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.) in my life that I was able to experience foreigner culture and being able to apply English at a daily basis. I found it fascinating the fact that over 40 different countries were living under the same roof. How did they manage? How were they able to surpass their differences, traditions, language barrier and still work as one body? I realized that being able to communicate freely and openly was the key. Because every person on board knew English, it transformed the crew into a community. With no doubts in mind, I knew that I needed to be part of that world. After finishing my first year at ISE, I signed in onboard the Logos II ship for 2 years of volunteering service. The experiences gained there, are of great value. Today I am able to fit better in different cultures and never jump quickly to conclusions when facing a new tradition.

I am privileged to have the opportunity to apply to International Bachelor Study Programme in Humanities at your prestigious University. This programme interested me the most, because it has all the features I am looking for in my education. The XX University have also a good sense of humour. I believe myself to be very open and free spirited and therefore, I believe I have found a study environment at XX that my ideals more personally. People at RU are free to express their own point of views or opinions, which it's not so familiar in many countries. It has a high educational standard and availability of modern facilities for learning. The university is always willing to have seasoned lecturers of international repute. Its campuses nurture and promote variety by accepting students from different nationalities and cultures.

I can still learn more of the English language itself and learn how it influences our world and its cultures in the process. The variety of the courses taught, can challenge me to grasp wider definitions of the language. I am excited to maybe find answers to: Why English is so widely spoken? How big a part has English had to the growth of globalisation? Would information flow so easily today, if English wasn't the major player in communicative ideas and marketing?

"Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow."
~Oliver Wendell Holmes

Only when we are able to understand the importance of language and communicating it well, are we able to understand each other better. No matter what background, no matter what the circumstances we find ourselves in. I see a time in the future where people enjoy the freedom of using languages to build and restore our world. To be passionate about poems, and written stories instead of only screen entertainment. I want to be part of learning how to catch the soul of spoken words and use it to build bridges and repair broken relationships; to revive the beauty of literature and strengthen its art form. I can see myself eager to challenge freedom of expression through English, or any other language in order to establish peace and global cooperation.

I am aware of, that the programme I am applying for is highly in demand and of competitive standards. I believe that I am well prepared to cope with the challenges and that I can meet your requirements for a successful study at XX University. I appreciate your consideration of my letter.

Sincerely,
Ilda Lómstein
Lomstein   
Feb 3, 2012
Writing Feedback / Art of writing, playing music; every have the right to choose any kind of music [6]

Hi paul1911,
I have few corrections and suggestions for your essay!

Music is an instrumental sound combined in a pleasing way . Music is a combination of sounds played by one or various instruments in a pleasing/harmonious way . It is an art of writing or playing music . (Is music an art of playing music? I don't understand..maybe you could rephrase it?) There are around hundreds of countries around the world today and all of them having a different traditional music. (When stating facts it is best to be more precise. I would suggest you write it like this:) The world is filled with a variety of cultures and each one of them, rich in its own interpretations of music.

No one knows from how many years we are listening to musicthe origins of music and for how long we have been listening to it . From where it has come from? All I can say, without music many people will loose their enthusiasm. Where does it come from? All I can say, is that without music many would have lost their source of enthusiasm.

It is believed, traditional music is more important than the international one, and it is being heard every nowadaysthat traditional music should be more important that "international one"(What do you mean?) . I think, todays generation children and adults likes to hear more international music than a traditional onethis generation prefers contemporary/modern music to traditional/folk musicWhereas, others likes to listen only traditional one. , although many like to listen to the latter one . This is because, some people think we should not stop listening to our traditional music, and we should continue to forward our traditional and culture from generation to generation and should not loose it completely. This is a very long sentence. I would break it into two or make it shorter. I believe the reason why traditional/folk music is still vital, is because of its importance in preserving certain cultures.

In my opinion, every person have the right to choose any kind of music he likes to listen. everyone is free to listen to whichever type of music they want. Whether it is completely international or traditional. and we should not interfere to the one's interest.
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳