Undergraduate / 'playing with Hot Wheels cars' - Essay for Common App: Most influential person [4]

I agree with @bbchen33. while your essay is interesting and ties in with the prompt given, you need to go in detail how your sister influenced your life and why you consider her as this influential figure in your life. "I also had to play and share my things with her." Perhaps you can elaborate on how that affected your interactions in life and your attitude?

Undergraduate / I am a woman. I am pragmatic and unpredictable; Barnard Transfer Essay! [4]

it is a well written essay. however, the prompt asks for why you want/need to transfer out of the place you are in right now. Rather than specifying what barnard can do for you in the commonapp statement, you should leave that for your supplement (if they ask you for one that is, if not, then by all means include what barnard has that you want that no other school can provide for you). include what you didnt like about your school whether it be your class size, lack of internship/research opportunities, etc. just dont bash on your school.