kykale
Nov 28, 2012
Undergraduate / UC transfer personal: I decided to go to the Phillippines, leaving my hometown, Korea [5]
2. Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
I just wrote about the story in the Phlippines. how you think about this essay? any advice or critique will be very much appreciated! and please help me with grammars too!
In April 2007, I, 15, decided to go to the Phillippines, leaving my hometown, Korea. The Philippines is known as the best country where you can learn English along with low prices. Moreover, Korean educational system prioritizes acquisition of English skill in the society. My parents wanted me to learn English systematically.
In early days in the Philippines, I had almost zero English knowledge, so it was almost impossible to communicate with classmates or residents. The dictionary was the only way for comprehension in the class and I felt so lonely since all I could say was "Hi" or "How are you?" Even in school, It was usual for me to read books in the corner. More and more, my oath, to reduce talking to Koreans but give my best on studying English, faded away. Hanging out with Korean friends became my happiest moment meanwhile homework, and quizzes were left blank. After 5 months from beginning of the semester, the result of midterm revealed. The result? It was frightful. English was F, math C, science D, and other subjects were also marked with C or B. These came as a shock to me, regretting the past of me; however, it was no use crying over spilt milk.
From then, I began to manage the majority of my time for the next final while trying to actively join school activities to get involved in the classroom despite lack of English skills, ten hours each week in participating voluntary librarian, exercised 15 hours each week for theater group. I welcomed opportunities where I can experience more and learn English with people. Furthermore, I trained myself for better English knowledge; reviewing phrases, memorizing vocabularies, and watching CNN. I pushed myself harder and harder to prevent the repetition of feeling regret, and it eventually drained me physically and mentally. Here is my typical day I had gone through:
6:00-6:30 Breakfast
6:30-7:30 Previewing vocabulary
8:00-4:00 School
4:00-5:30 Library volunteer
5:30-6:00 Dinner
6:00-8:00 acting practice
8:00-10:00 Study, practice
When there was an exam or contest(Even though I could not join as a foreign student), the study time or assisting contestants in acting club replaced days but I still maintained English and subject reviews at night. There was no enough time to sleep during those days as library assistant and acting practices never ceased.
As time passed, I was able to incredibly improve all of my grades. Especially, I was excited about the fact that I could give a fine showing in English, B, in 2 years. On the other hand, I was not content with the past activities and studies. I always looked forward to be an acknowledged student indeed. On graduation day, the president awarded me "Student Improvement Award" with honor, given to a student who showed a great improvement in grades and participation in the school. I am proud not of any accomplishment, school activities or academic achievement during 2 years of my high school in the Philippines, but I was able to acquire constant time management, endurance, and advanced socialization in the society. To be most important, I took one step ahead to stand independently, and endure (adverb) --> dont know what would be the best adverb to add.. any recommendation?
2. Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
I just wrote about the story in the Phlippines. how you think about this essay? any advice or critique will be very much appreciated! and please help me with grammars too!
In April 2007, I, 15, decided to go to the Phillippines, leaving my hometown, Korea. The Philippines is known as the best country where you can learn English along with low prices. Moreover, Korean educational system prioritizes acquisition of English skill in the society. My parents wanted me to learn English systematically.
In early days in the Philippines, I had almost zero English knowledge, so it was almost impossible to communicate with classmates or residents. The dictionary was the only way for comprehension in the class and I felt so lonely since all I could say was "Hi" or "How are you?" Even in school, It was usual for me to read books in the corner. More and more, my oath, to reduce talking to Koreans but give my best on studying English, faded away. Hanging out with Korean friends became my happiest moment meanwhile homework, and quizzes were left blank. After 5 months from beginning of the semester, the result of midterm revealed. The result? It was frightful. English was F, math C, science D, and other subjects were also marked with C or B. These came as a shock to me, regretting the past of me; however, it was no use crying over spilt milk.
From then, I began to manage the majority of my time for the next final while trying to actively join school activities to get involved in the classroom despite lack of English skills, ten hours each week in participating voluntary librarian, exercised 15 hours each week for theater group. I welcomed opportunities where I can experience more and learn English with people. Furthermore, I trained myself for better English knowledge; reviewing phrases, memorizing vocabularies, and watching CNN. I pushed myself harder and harder to prevent the repetition of feeling regret, and it eventually drained me physically and mentally. Here is my typical day I had gone through:
6:00-6:30 Breakfast
6:30-7:30 Previewing vocabulary
8:00-4:00 School
4:00-5:30 Library volunteer
5:30-6:00 Dinner
6:00-8:00 acting practice
8:00-10:00 Study, practice
When there was an exam or contest(Even though I could not join as a foreign student), the study time or assisting contestants in acting club replaced days but I still maintained English and subject reviews at night. There was no enough time to sleep during those days as library assistant and acting practices never ceased.
As time passed, I was able to incredibly improve all of my grades. Especially, I was excited about the fact that I could give a fine showing in English, B, in 2 years. On the other hand, I was not content with the past activities and studies. I always looked forward to be an acknowledged student indeed. On graduation day, the president awarded me "Student Improvement Award" with honor, given to a student who showed a great improvement in grades and participation in the school. I am proud not of any accomplishment, school activities or academic achievement during 2 years of my high school in the Philippines, but I was able to acquire constant time management, endurance, and advanced socialization in the society. To be most important, I took one step ahead to stand independently, and endure (adverb) --> dont know what would be the best adverb to add.. any recommendation?