nhatanh
Sep 3, 2013
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing task 1: Lonely life by gender profile [5]
please help me with my vocabulary and grammar. thanks
The diagram illustrates the proportion of British having a lonely life by gender and age profile in 2004/2005.
The most unique feature of the graph is that the number of elderly people who live alone took up the highest proportion in total.
As can be seen, less women were prone to suffer a lone living than men from the age of 16 to 64. Both the 16-24 and the 45-64 age groups showed the same parttern, with the figure of men virtually outperformed the ones of women, just merely 5% and 4% in the former as well as 15% and 14% in the latter. Nonetheless, there was a considerable difference between male and female from 25 to 44 years old experiencing a single life. In particular, the quantity of women constituted only a half of that of men, which occupied above 15%
Turning to the older group, there was an inversion in the dominance which women accounted for an overwhelming majority and significantly exceeded men. Especially, the percentage of women was double the men's, roughly 32% and 60% respectively in each group.
please help me with my vocabulary and grammar. thanks
The diagram illustrates the proportion of British having a lonely life by gender and age profile in 2004/2005.
The most unique feature of the graph is that the number of elderly people who live alone took up the highest proportion in total.
As can be seen, less women were prone to suffer a lone living than men from the age of 16 to 64. Both the 16-24 and the 45-64 age groups showed the same parttern, with the figure of men virtually outperformed the ones of women, just merely 5% and 4% in the former as well as 15% and 14% in the latter. Nonetheless, there was a considerable difference between male and female from 25 to 44 years old experiencing a single life. In particular, the quantity of women constituted only a half of that of men, which occupied above 15%
Turning to the older group, there was an inversion in the dominance which women accounted for an overwhelming majority and significantly exceeded men. Especially, the percentage of women was double the men's, roughly 32% and 60% respectively in each group.