Undergraduate / Bursting My Bubble - "Intellectual Vitality" Stanford Supplement [11]

I have a few concerns: would an anecdote be inappropriate for this prompt? Is it too flowery? Does it actually show my intellectual vitality? Also, any comments/corrections would be greatly appreciated.

Bloop. With the poke of his finger, the tangerine-sized bubble burst into soapy vapor. Jacob let out a triumphant squeal of delight. "Jacob...c'mon, that's the fifth one." With a heavy sigh, I took my bubble wand and proceeded to make the sixth.

For the last couple hours, my time volunteering at the Bubble Learning Station of Discovery Science Center's Bubblefest had gone without a hitch. The kids would listen intently as I explained the marvels of the humble bubble. To me, they were absolutely fascinating: the molecular properties of soapy water, the filmy display of spectral colors, the bubble inside a bubble. Everything about them sparked the mind.

Yet how could I explain all this to Jacob without live bubbles? Bubble after deceased bubble, I grew frustrated. But then it hit me. Yes, of course! With a single scientific bubbly property, his inquisitive hands became my advantage. "Jacob, stick your hands in this." Instinctively, he plunged his hands into the soapy solution I put before him. With a puff of air, I blew the bubble. His hand instantly shot up for the soapy sphere, but to his amazement, the bubble clung to his finger, perfectly intact. He looked at me wide-eyed; he needed an explanation. "You've got soap molecules all over your hands. That's why it won't pop." And for the first time, he listened; the bubbly science - concepts like surface tension and hydrophillic-and-phobic - filled his curiosity. That March afternoon, I discovered sometimes we truly learn hands-on.

Also here's my "letter to my future roommate." How's the tone? Too laid-back?

iHola amigo!

One word...STANFORD! Can you believe it? The very thought tickles me silly. I can just taste it; this year will be an apple burrito on a breezy beach day: out-of-bounds...

Before moving in, I have one request: no stinky socks all over the place! I know it's inevitable; socks are for sports (and gliding on freshly-polished hallways), but please, keep your socky stank confined! Other than that, I'm pretty laid-back. As long as our dorm's not on fire, we'll be fine.

But I digress; more on-point, here's a bit about me: I'm a crazy Arsenal F.C. fan, and I duly apologize if my full-spirited celebrations get out of hand. Though if you want, I've got a spare Arsenal jersey with your name on it. In fact, I'll bring you a pair of cleats so we can kick it later around The Farm.

For the most part, I like to take it easy. You'll find me under a tree (fear it!) or at the coffee shop, reading news, listening to NPR, or doing some homework. But don't be fooled by my easygoing nature. By all means, if something outrageously cool is about to happen, let me know; I'm all about taking opportunities. Maybe there's a Vampire Weekend concert or all-you-can-eat sundae at Branner Hall, I'll be there. At Stanford, a school full of vibrant, dynamic kids, I'll never know what to expect. And so, my fellow Cardinal, in the words of Calvin and Hobbes, "It's a magical world...Let's go exploring!"

Undergraduate / I am no soccer prodigy; UC Essay [2]

Prompt 1 of the common app comes to mind, but what other prompts could possibly fit?

UC Essay:
I am no soccer prodigy. For the past three years of high school soccer I've diligently warmed the bench. My plastic gold trophies of childhood recreational soccer read "participant," but I'm proud to have participated. I'm proud to play the sport I love because of the friends and memories I've made along the way.

Unfettered by expectations to be the best, I've garnered a deep passion for soccer. For the past ten years soccer has been an outlet from the stresses of everyday life-a way to have fun, simple and carefree. My friends and I have formed United PGC (pick-up game club), a motley group of weekend warriors dedicated to the mission of united soccer. In the lightheartedness of our pick-up games, we've blasted shots well over the goal and tumbled to the ground attempting ridiculous skill moves. Yet despite our blunders we've always encouraged each other to keep trying, to keep playing soccer. I've taken this peer encouragement to heart. If I can't become a professional soccer player, I at least want to share the joys of soccer with others.

This past August I organized and directed a week-long soccer camp for kids ages five to eleven in my hometown Mission Viejo. Sponsored by the nonprofit Kicking4Hunger, campers were asked to donate food rather than pay a camp fee. Soccer became not only a sport, but a way to help the community.

The camp itself was nothing too impressive: thirty energetic kids as campers, my friends as counselors, and a pair of portable nets as soccer goals. For many of these kids, it was their first year playing soccer, and it showed. Armen saw it fit to perform throw-ins basketball style. Londen, Kamden, and Brynn formed the bumblebee trio, a surprisingly effective tactic for getting the ball. As unconventional as these methods were, who was I to criticize their soccer antics? My friends and I gave them pointers, worked on the technical side of the game, but above all else made sure that fun and teamwork were the priorities. We incorporated soccer fundamentals like passing and dribbling into a series of lively, engaging group activities. Soccer capture the flag, keep away and soccer freeze-tag were among the favorites, camper and counselor alike. By the end of the camp, I couldn't say these kids developed their skills to the highest potential, but I was certain they had a blast. And on the plus side, we collected over 300 pounds of food for Second Harvest Food Bank.

On the last day of camp, my friends and I were given a surprising goodbye gift. The campers, the boys and girls whom we had so much fun teaching, decided to return the favor; these kids group tackled us to the ground. Although there was a small mountain of kids on top of me, I felt a weight come off my shoulders.

For my entire life I've felt a pressure to be the best both in and out of school; soccer has told me otherwise. Maybe I won't play at the collegiate or even club level, but going into college I bring with me my footy passion. I bring with me the understanding that I don't have to be the best to make a difference for anything I truly love.