Undergraduate / My hand was tremendously shaking; my mind was filled with excessive thoughts - MIT supplement essay [2]

Prompt: Tell us about the most significant challenge you have faced or something important that did not go according to plan. How did you manage the situation? ( 200-250 words)

Hi everyone! I have trouble with words ( mine is 292 )
Please tell me your opinion about how to change or how to revise.
Which part is not necessary?

My hand was tremendously shaking; my mind was filled with excessive thoughts.
Last summer, I participated at IPhO 2014 as a contestant. Having filled with full confidence and lots of preparation, I was sure that I could get at least silver medal. When I entered the competition hall, I took a deep breath and completely believed myself.

Theory problems were so tough, but after hearing other best students complaining, I was still confident about my performance. Two days later, the experimental competition finally began. First tasks were so easy and had high points. Hence, I started next part quickly and setup equipment as depicted on the picture to avoid certain defection. But real problems were arises. My circuit did not work. I was calling back again and again the advisor to change my apparatus one by one. Both of us got frustrated. We became annoyed. After desperately trying to begin my work, I found that my key of the circuit was broken in first place. I could not concentrate at all, because I wasted my precious 4 of the 5 hours for this thing. I was shocked and decided to give up at that time. Suddenly, I saw that my mother's face in my mind. I made promise to her that I would bring medal and she truly believed my words. If I became the only one who could not get any awards, how could I meet my mother? Therefore, I decided to do what I could in one hour. I became crazy and just focused on my work. Eventually, I overcame myself. Although I did not finish my work, I was still happy at my performance. I got bronze medal. If I had given up, I would have not gotten anything.

Undergraduate / I was a really loquacious kid. Common application essay 1st topic [2]

prompt: Some students have a background or story that is so central to their identity that they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

I was a really loquacious kid. I always buried my parents with odd questions and desperately tried to find answers. A simple conversation between us would go something like this "Why these trees are green? - Because it is summer-What is summer?"

Having wanted to know more, I started to read books. The more I read, the more I interested in books. I, even, tried to memorize historical facts and names of different capital cities. Although it seemed really strange, I really loved to do these stuffs. As a time goes by, I entered in secondary school. Due to lots of hard assignments, I eventually reduced my time for books. Moreover, I was bored to just read. Indeed, I wanted more creative works. At this time, I had just finished "Traveling to the Moon" by Jules Verne which was my first and last science novel. The plan, firing wagon with 3 people to the Moon, was very simple yet elegant. That was the first time that I was ever admired human beings great imagination and ambition.

Wanting to understand more about accurate details of this plan, I began reading physics articles, further decided to attend physics class. I learnt basic physics concepts which were enough to understand this plan; however I wanted to deepen my knowledge of science. I, finally, found a really creative work, in my view. When I finished new lesson, I always wanted to learn another one. Finally, I began to compete in local physics Olympiads. Because I thought class lessons were not enough, I started to solve independently previous Olympiad problems which had only answers. But, this type of learning had one weakness. When I could not solve problems, I just saw answers and invented new nebulous methods. However, most interestingly, these methods used to work very well in local competitions. Hence, I convinced that I knew physics well. As a result, I only had bunch of formulas which I did not know the real meaning. When someone asked me a physics question, I could not answer because I only knew formulas. That was an absolute wrong way to learn physics. Therefore, I decided to attend to higher level class in National University of Mongolia.

After seeing our professor's awesome techniques to deal with mathematics as well as physics problems, I was really admired. These skills were completely different from my limited methods. Moreover, his physics lectures went to the very core of it. It was a really interesting to know deep meaning of formulas. Some lectures were so confusing that they directly contradicted to my previous false knowledge. Simple subjects were becoming more complex and paradoxical. But when I understood them, I felt blissful. Finally, I was selected one of the International Physics Olympiad team. In addition to taking this class, I began reading college physics books, watching several open courses of US universities, and taking some EDX courses. Especially, college books were very exciting because it included not only physics interesting phenomenon, but also great part scientist's contribution to the physics. For instance, And also, courses were so effective and quite exciting. Sometimes I needed to spend 10 hours per day, yet I did not feel tired. I was really interested in physics at this time. If I did another subject with great amount of time, I would not tolerate.

These years were precious of my life. Physics became something that I always love and talk. When strangers talk about physics, I try to find a way to discuss them. I could not even describe my compassion toward science, especially physics. Although I only learnt really tiny piece of science, I strongly believe that this knowledge will help me to explore more.