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Posts by Janie Tine
Joined: Jul 22, 2009
Last Post: Aug 2, 2009
Threads: 2
Posts: 6  
From: Japan

Displayed posts: 8
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Janie Tine   
Jul 23, 2009
Writing Feedback / The benefits of technology versus the costs [11]

Do the benefits of technology always outweigh the costs?
_______________________

We are now in the modernized and industrialized world, an ideal place for technology to develop. Technology has many benefits indeed, and those benefits may outweigh the costs. However, this depends largely on the effective utilize of each person, the way to use technology in daily life.

Technology changes the world, makes it a better place for us to live. Many achievements are made to serve our needs. For instance, in the past, weaving fabric was a difficult, time-consuming job. Since James Watt, a Scottish inventor and mechanical engineer, invented a steam machine in 1784, weaving fabric became much easily. Many fabrics were made for the consumer market, and it did not need much human physical strength. Now we no more do everything by hands, because machines are created to help us. Therefore, labor efficiency changes remarkably. In medicine and pharmacy, technology also plays an important role. For example, Charles Drew, Chair of Surgery at Howard University, discovered a way to preserve blood. This invention made a great progress to history of medicine. Blood Bank, the storing of blood plasma system, helps to store, preserve, and reconstitute blood for a later use. Technological equipment, in weather forecast, help save more lives and predict natural disasters. In the past, when a storm comes, most of us do not realize the danger. Now we can forecast the weather and even more and more correctly.

Technology can widen our knowledge. For example, television, with many channels, contains many different kinds of knowledge from all over the world. It can not only entertain us but also show us everything. More specifically, the Discovery, a scientific channel, contains much information about science and technology. The Planet Animal comprises many events about the environment. Besides television, the Internet is extremely useful and important. We can read newspapers and magazines online for new information. We may study or find some useful things on the Internet for learning by Google, for example. We can even discuss with each other about something on forums to understand it clearly.

In addition, the costs of technology seem to come from the wrong use of people. For example, television has a lot of channels, so it is easily affect people leading to addiction. Moreover, people can watch television to relax, but too much would do harm to the eyes. For another example, some people use Internet for bad things like to deceive, steal information, or account of other people. Maybe they use it for depraved things on many bad websites. More dangerous thing is that Internet is used for terrorization. It could lead to wars, and the world-wide peace would be destroyed. Therefore, people must use technology judiciously.

In conclusion, technology is monumentally beneficial. It creates a better world and enrich the knowledge of people. Nevertheless, the wisdom of using technology is absolutely necessary and important to avoid the costs.
Janie Tine   
Jul 29, 2009
Writing Feedback / The benefits of technology versus the costs [11]

Thank you very much!!!
I did listed the advantages of technology, but do you think I listed too many? I think my essay is quite long, isn't it?
Janie Tine   
Jul 29, 2009
Writing Feedback / The benefits of technology versus the costs [11]

Thank you! I understand now. I'll try to fix it.
But there is one thing I'd like to ask. You can see the first sentence of my essay. My teacher told me that it was quite illogical. She also said," Does in "the modernized and industrialized world" technology develop or technology develops which makes our world to become modern and ideal?" What do you think about that?
Janie Tine   
Jul 29, 2009
Writing Feedback / True Friendship Essay (living without friends) [12]

I think your revised essay is quite good. However, I am really confused with this. You said,"As we grow up, our parents give us more free time. We start to make our own friends and like to hang out with them. In that time, we cannot figure out what are good friends or bad friends because of limited knowledge and life experience." I think life experience doesn't depend much on "age". It relies on the life circumstances that person was in and how he overcame those. One encountering many hardships will be more mature. For example, a girl lost her family and had nowhere to live. Day by day, this girl wandered everywhere, saw many situations, many kinds of people... She understood all the behaviors of others, but she is still 12.

Well, that is my thought. Good luck!!!
Janie Tine   
Jul 29, 2009
Writing Feedback / "Actions speak louder than words" (do you agree or disagree with the statement) [8]

Topic: Do you agree or disagree with this statement? "Actions speak louder than words"

Words and actions are two kinds of emotional behaviors. It is ironic that some people are always talking. But they are doing nothing. As a consequence, I completely agree with the statement:" Actions speak louder than words" because of the reasons presented below.

Diligence is better than laziness, intelligence than foolishness, honesty than dishonesty, anybody acknowledges that fact. But in this life, many people know the good without following it, the evil without avoiding it. For instance, they still smoke, even though they know it is bad. Nobody can rival them in speaking, yet their behaviors are undeserving. Therefore, it is easy to speak but difficult to act.

Moreover, if you,just talk without your specific actions, you will become a boastful person to people. People could possibly look down on you. Then, what should you do? You must act. If you act without words, you can become an astute and intelligent person. People will not compare you to those talkative, and useless. That is the best way to behave in community.

In conclusion, words is nothing but words. Actions is the way to make people admire you. Do not talk much, just act, because actions speak louder than words.
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