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Posts by moniquebedo
Name: Monica Bedoya
Joined: Feb 23, 2016
Last Post: Feb 25, 2016
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: Colombia
School: Icesi

Displayed posts: 3
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moniquebedo   
Feb 23, 2016
Scholarship / 'I study two majors' - Essay to apply for Korean government scholarship [2]

Hi there, this is my essay. I want to apply for a korea scholarship and this is the first part

What the ask:
Your course of life, your view of life, study background, your hopes & wishes, etc
Your education and work experience, etc., in relation to the KGSP program
Your motivations for applying for this program
Reason for study in Korea

My essay:

Self-Introduction

Since I was a child I knew the value of education. Neither of my parents could assist to collage and because of that they had to face many problems. So they taught me that education was important to raise my goals and wishes. That's the reason why I studies two majors: International Marketing and Advertising and Interactive Media Design, the duo that I consider the best combination to development skills in research, communication and social design, because of the focus in the university, oriented in be a change agent.

With every decision I made I realized that I have to do an extra effort: when I started with two careers I had to find jobs to pay the second major, I studied harder to maintain my average and can continue with the two majors and study and work at the same time wasn't easy. I have to become a very organized person, someone that don't give up and that is willing to maintain the rhythm, energetic, open mind, someone who competes with herself. I learned to find a balance between my academic life, volunteer work and other activities that a love, like exercise, photography, literature and handwork.

At university I created a lot of interesting works, like work with the Indian community NASA, to development a system that teach kids to speak Spanish and English, system they are using now; projects to create companies for the semester that has incomes and social responsibility. Working with real companies in activities that we called "El trasnochon", a real company gives us a problem and from a day to another (without sleep) we must find creative and innovative solutions that solve the problems, I was part of two teams that organized important events in Latin America: "Sinergia" the most important free event of Marketing, people around the world participated in this event and "Hoy es Diseńo" (Today is design) a free design event that bring people around the world to talk about design in life and as a solution for society. My two final projects at university were oriented to create simple solutions to social problems: For marketin, strategies to increate heath care in neediest people with cultural activities and for design a rehabilitation system to help kids with muscle problems.

I think Colombia is a great country, but it could be better if we just focus in the right things. I grew up seeing social and economic inequality, which had its roots in the few educational opportunities and social prejudices of the studied people. That the reason why I decided to be part of that team that believe that an small change can make a difference, and started working as volunteer with FUNOF, an organization focus in oriented and help families, where I taught kids computer science and how development self-confidence and the value of education for a future. Like FUNOF I was volunteer in other organizations, like "Litro de luz" a project that works with families that didn't have light in their homes and live in home invasion, the project choose families that had the profile and want to work together with the volunteers and have an organic light system in their homes; "Samaritanos de la Calle" a project that work with homeless people, know them and help the to get involved in the society and now with "Colorss foundation" an Indian organizations that work with kids and women to prevent violence and give them tools to learn and have education and skills to work (for women).

I want to apply for this program because I have studied the Asian culture for long time and I admire the value they give to education because they understand how importance it is for the future and I am familiarized with the "Korean miracle": how Korea became a developed country in short time and how they did it. Korea is the country I want to learn from. Not only the economic and political process of the change, but also the social development that help it. How Korea act like a team, a collective that walk together and no parts of something, the education that teach and oriented them to be functional not only to book knowledge. Besides, Colombia and Korea are really different cultures that can be a perfect complement, the exchange of knowledge, resources, knowhow and support of this two countries can make a big different for both, not only to Colombia and not only in economic and political field, but also in culture and social issues. This program gives the opportunity to be involved in an academic and cultural way with one year of Korean language and two years of master.

This qualities and interests led me to be part of a network of people with different ideas and experience that make me grow up as person and professional and at the end help me to make de final decision of been part of the Korean Government scholarship.
moniquebedo   
Feb 25, 2016
Undergraduate / Self introduction essay for World friends Korea Coodinator [3]

I tried to fix problems in first paragraph:

Since twenty years old, I lived in Busan, the second biggest city in Korea, for my bachelor degree of Marine bio-materials and Aquaculture . This part is confusing, looks like you wanted start a senstence but did not finish it, may be you can say:

where I studied my bachelor degree in Marine bio-materials and Aquaculture.

A year later, I fulfilled the mandatory military service in ROKMC (Republic Of Korea Marine Corps) for about two years and ,then went to Senegal as a volunteer through KOICA. I led a very impressive life in small rural area Fatick for a yearWhere I lived in an small rural areacould be interesting if you write about what you did there, wath kind of volunteer work

After that, I returned to Korea and [...] my day. I graduated last summer.

you can say

Once I returned to Korea I started University and got a part time job to paid for my studies and life. This was really heplful for me, even when studing and working was not easy I grew up as a personal and professional. In my last semester, my dream of styding in a foreign country become true and I studied in Latvia, with friends from all over the world, one of the best parts of my life.

ĄGood luck!
moniquebedo   
Feb 25, 2016
Scholarship / 'graduate school is a serious commitment'; My attempt at writing a self introductory letter for KGSP [3]

Hi there,

more that a grammar correction, here are some tips:

1. Te KGS gives you just one page to write your self-introductions, don't know how important is write about korean dramas and the words you know, this first page should be the way you seduce them with who you are, for example not put that you love korean dramas, put that you have been interested in corean culture long time ago and started learn it by yourself. this is your opportunity to stand out between all other candidates, learn a few words becuase of dramas don't make you special.

2. I consider the first paragraph should be more creative too (like bloomingdaisy said before), this is the thesis of who you are, could be good start with something personal that led you studied all that, your motivations and problemes to raise your goals.

3.Remember when in the KGS ask for "Your course of life, your view of life", so may be write more things about you as a person, an strong person, responsable, organized...qualities you have that could help you be consider for the scholarship.

this are just tips for your essay.

good luck
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