Undergraduate / Essay pertaining to a life expeirience that influenced character [2]

Prompt: Tell a story from your life, describing an experience that either demonstrates your character or helped to shape it

can i cutback to less than 300 words, how so? is this a good essay?

I was driving home from a party on a Saturday night. It must have been around 10 o' clock, the road was slippery from a steady rain all afternoon, but my dad's heavy duty truck tires drove with ease. As I pushed in the brake pedal going down a steep hill, my headlights caught a scene that frightened me- two cars, A Subaru that had skidded onto the side of the road, and a crushed minivan with a family inside. Just a moment before I had been driving along at ease with my favorite rock station on the radio, now a very serious accident had presented itself in front of me, and I was the first responder. The initial fear of seeing the accident had already subsided; I knew I needed to act calmly and rationally. I put my hazards on, jumped out of my truck and ran to the minivan. The Subaru was closer but the driver had already left her vehicle; she was in distress but not hurt. I quickly helped the children and their mother out of their car and onto the side of the road to safety. The mother carried a small baby in her arms that managed to sleep through the entire ordeal. After the initial adrenaline rush, I was relieved to discover no one was hurt, only a costly insurance claim. I guided the cars to a nearby park where they would not block traffic and called the local police non emergency number. As I drove home, the events played through my head. At first I thought it was no big deal, after all, no one was hurt, everyone was alright. Then I thought, "would things have turned out alright if I wasn't there to help?". The drivers of the car where in obvious distress, but my calm and level headed attitude helped organize out the situation and ensured everyone was alright. The accident I faced that night reminds me that a calm, logical thinking pattern is essential to many tricky situations that I had and will encounter in my life.

Undergraduate / An essay pertaining to why I would like to be a hokie (Virginia tech) [2]

insight/ proofreading please

prompt: What are the top five reasons you want to be a Hokie? 300 word max

Becoming a Hokie at Virginia Tech would be a lifelong accomplishment to me. Both my Father, Adam, and my aunt Melissa have given me a strong sense association to Virginia Tech since I was a child. I admire the plentiful benefits that Virginia tech offers it's students. As an outgoing person, I am sure I would excel in a large student body that gives off such a strong sense of community. I would very much look forward to making friends and integrating into such a healthy and large student body. While campus life is an important aspect to me, I want to be sure that I am working towards a valid and clear goal throughout my education at tech. Because of this, I am strongly inclined to the wide array of career paths offered; specifically Landscaping; a career path that I have already advanced myself in. In addition to the appeal of Virginia Tech's student body, the appeal of an award winning campus meal program is another reason to be a Hokie. Myself and my family have grown up eating home cooked meals at the dinner table every night, and the rather bland and sometimes unhealthy food choices at other colleges worry me. Lastly, I believe being a Hokie does not exist without being in Blacksburg. After visiting the campus and the town, I genuinely appreciate the landscape both outside and inside the town. The town to me gave off a strong combination of quaintness and a vibrancy that comes from the people; both the students and residents. The reasons above outline a few of the many ways I envision myself as a Hokie in my home state of Virginia.