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Posts by hasanah_13 [Suspended]
Name: hasanah eka wahyu ningsih
Joined: Apr 25, 2017
Last Post: Apr 25, 2017
Threads: -
Posts: 2  
From: Indonesia
School: airlangga university

Displayed posts: 2
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hasanah_13   
Apr 25, 2017
Writing Feedback / Expenditure of five countries by category [2]

GRAMMAR
what isthe biggest proportion of ... -------------------- use past tense because the year is 2002
firstly, all people in those countriesspendtheir fund on ... ----------------- use past tens [spent]
Furthermore, the second highest [ was ] occupied by ... ----------- add was there
Turning to the second category is clothing and footwear ... --------- past tense [was]
the rest three countries spend almost similar on ... ---------------------- past tense spent

Maybe you can reduce using too much number presenting the percentage and replace it with word such as 32,14% ----- just over a third and etc

thanks
hasanah_13   
Apr 25, 2017
Scholarship / Communication and media - challenging world; study plan for scholarship [3]

maybe, i can help you with the grammar :)

I expect to take an all media ----------------------- without an
Communication and media is a world full of (...) things that gives the opportunity to ... ------------------------------- (1. are 2.give, avoid using too much [.], reduce it)

having my own talk show where to receive ----------- without "to"
... interesting segments, that makes people (...) and to deal----------------------------- [make, without to]
What drove my attention was that it is first------------------------------ past tense
Communication and media teaches--------------- if you mean the "communication and media is a major, mention it "Communication and media major" so when people read it isnt confused

... not used such as too much [....] or [---]

thanks
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