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Posts by harrybin
Name: Harry D Gorges
Joined: Sep 11, 2017
Last Post: Sep 12, 2017
Threads: 1
Posts: 1  
From: Viet Nam
School: Luong Van Chanh

Displayed posts: 2
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harrybin   
Sep 12, 2017
Writing Feedback / We are living in the world of highly-educated people [5]

dear holt, so you mean that discussing focused paragraphs will always be better than just using too many academic words ? right ?
my Coherence and cohesiveness are affected so how about the overall score ? which band can i get in writing task 2 with that essay w the topic " : Some People Believe That A College Or University Education Should Be Available To All Students. Others Believe That Higher Education Should Be Available To Only Good Students. Discuss These Views. Which View Do You agree with ?? "
harrybin   
Sep 11, 2017
Writing Feedback / We are living in the world of highly-educated people [5]

Topic : some people believe that a college or university education should be available to all students

education is essential

No centuries before but the 21st century has witnessed a visually spectacular mounting in numerous fields due to large numbers of highly-educated people. What's more, tertiary education is considered as the determining factor that produces dozens of graduates who are ready to cope with all changes, the various working environment and the well-advanced technology. However, there is an opinion emerges that university education should be restricted to the very best academic students. From my perspective, such accessment is entirely unjustifiable and I strongly support that it should be available to a large propotion of youngsters. This is a much better situation for several reasons.

On the one hand, it is conspicuous that straight after finishing high school, teenagers will face the dilemma of whether to get a job or continue with higher education. If governmental bodies follow the idea that higher education should be in conformity with only good students, then a large number of other youngsters will choose to abandon education and start working, because their previous volitions of higher education are all annihilated, eventually, it will imply dozens of complicated problems. The imbalance in the academic standard is clearly the typical example for this case. Moreover, academic qualifications are required in various professions, the job market is mounting up competitively and unemployments are inevitable. Young people who do not have qualifications with great academic performance from universities will never stand a chance in the society.

On the other hand, in order to grow students's talent pools, there should be equal rights for individuals to be given opportunities to tap their potential to the full and work towards their lifelong ambitions. Everything in this world is based on the principles of justice which no longer have discriminatory treatment anymore. Going to universities is a part of this. By way of illustration, the well-off students of influential families can choose some private universities that have tremendous fees; the diligent students who study incessantly can be suitable for high-ranked universities or the students those living blow the line go with moderate fees universities. Generally, it is fair that anyone who could benefit from tertiary education should access to one, because in some cases, no one could even know that by receiving higher education, accidentally, that student who was trivival and impoverished could shake off poverty, climb high up to the social ladder and then live better off.

All in all, education is integral to the economic and social well-being of the entire country, therefore, making all education as well as tertiary education available throughout the country can eliminate illiteracy and pave the way for economic and social development. From those aforementioned reasons, I strongly believe that without exerting adverse effects or panic-stricken consequences on the society as a whole, university education should be available not only to those with good academic performance at middle school, but to those who are little bit mediocre as well.

p/s : Dear teachers, how do i score with that essay in IELTS writing task 2 ???
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