Posts by CallieO

CallieO

Aug 27, 2018

Undergraduate / Education - the key to freedom. An attempt to write Statement of Purpose essay for UT [4]

Thank you for your honesty @Holt. I have rewritten my statement of purpose and I hope that this draft answers the prompt more adequately.

Upon graduating high school, I felt limitless. I had graduated with as many honors as I could possibly earn and enough IB credit to earn myself a little less college stress. A few weeks after graduating I attended freshman orientation at Baylor University and, while I was wary of attending BU at first, I grew to appreciate the unique nursing track that Baylor had to offer its students. The competitive environment that I felt during orientation thrilled me, academic competition is one of my biggest motivators and I knew that this would help bring me to my full potential. The second day of orientation all students received our estimated fall bill. Once my parents and I received my bill I felt my newfound commitment to BU wavering as those six figures stared me in the face. My parents assured me that financial aid was going to take care of a majority of my tuition and we could take out loans for the remaining amount. I left orientation wide-eyed, although, with a bit of disbelief in the pit of my stomach.

Weeks later we received our official fall bill through the mail and I felt disbelief consume me. Although my financial aid and scholarships took care of a decent portion of my tuition we still had to pay $20,000 for the whole year. Not easily deterred, my family and I applied for numerous student loans and got denied for each and every one of them. I could feel my college dreams slipping away and I was angry. "Why did I work so hard in high school if I wasn't even going to be able to attend college?" I asked myself as I frantically applied to UTA and ACC determined to attend college in the fall of 2018.

Eventually, I received a decision from _______ and although I applied too late to be a part of the nursing program, I attempted to model my classes after the nursing curriculum. While I am ever grateful to ______ for providing me with an education, I feel that my intellect would be better challenged and nurtured at the University of Texas at Austin. Not only does UT have the top-ranked nursing program but, there are also more research opportunities which would give me the chance to branch out and explore different aspects of the medical field, further granting me the opportunity to narrow my medical focus as a nurse. I apply with the intention of becoming the best healthcare personnel that I can be and I feel that the University of Texas at Austin is the only University that will provide me with every resource I need in order to fulfill my intentions.

CallieO

Aug 21, 2018

Undergraduate / Education - the key to freedom. An attempt to write Statement of Purpose essay for UT [4]

Hello! I am attempting to write my Statement of Purpose essay for UT, and I was hoping to get some feedback on my writing so far. I would genuinely appreciate any help that you have to offer!

UT Austin Transfer Essay - Statement of Purpose

At 2 years old, a child has a multitude of synapses; a direct result of the young mind processing all the information that this new life entails. As the child ages, the synapses that are not used on a daily bases are lost due to neural pruning and the ones that are kept continue to strengthen as the child grows. For as long as I can remember, learning has been second nature to me. When I was younger, my father was pursuing his degree in Nuclear Medicine and occasionally, when he would get me for visitation, my father would have to study for a course in which he would always enlist my aid. Together we would pour over diagrams and procedures for hours upon end or, at least, until my bedtime. When the time came my father took it upon himself to ensure that I knew how to read. We spent countless hours studying the great writings of Dr. Seuss as I tried to convert the content on the pages into my spoken language. "El conocimiento es poder" my father would say, "once you know how to read no one can ever take that away from you."

It seems that although my young mind never retained any of the textbook information that I stared at while my father studied, what I did retain was the resolute knowledge that education was the key to freedom.

This mentality echoed within me as I attempted to emulate it throughout my academic experiences and accomplishments. When I was in high school I pursued the International Baccalaureate Diploma. This pursuit required more than the satiation of the IB curriculum, it required that the student also pursue what it is to live a good life through our obligations to humanity. In exploring this portion of the IB Diploma I found myself meeting people from all walks of life whether it be in Texas or the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. Each person that I had the pleasure of meeting had a story to tell. To me, they were faces and names but to other people, they were wives, sons, nieces, uncles, granddaughters, fathers and friends. Throughout my experiences I couldn't help but feel bonded with the people I had met, they had allowed me to peek into their lives and be a part of their story, however small. It soon became clear to me that in exploring my obligation to humanity I had simultaneously stumbled upon a desire to ensure the wellbeing of the people that I came across. In doing this I came to the realization that, while knowledge is power, an education is best used when it is used to benefit others.

The University of Texas at Austin's groundbreaking medical branch provides me with a set of diverse options, infinite possibilities to grant myself an education through whatever outlet I opt. More importantly, to study and work alongside one of America's leading research institutions will provide me with what I have been taught to seek out my entire life: the beginning steps towards the freedom that a higher education can provide.