Posts by vuthaihoa74

vuthaihoa74

Nov 1, 2019

Writing Feedback / IELTS Writng task 1: why UK adults attend arts events [4]

@suong1510
thank you. to be honest, i'm really struglling with the tenses for my writing. Overall, i think the use is proper, however, there are some points i'm not really sure if i should use simple past tense or simple present.

vuthaihoa74

Oct 31, 2019

Writing Feedback / IELTS Writng task 1: why UK adults attend arts events [4]

Question: The table below shows the results of a 20-year study into why adults in the UK attend arts events.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

participating in arts events in the uk

My writing:
The table given illustrates the finding of a study from 20 years ago until present which helps to explains why UK adults participate in arts events. It is clear from the infoformation provided that the most popular reason among these is the enthusiasm to see celebrities' appearance.

In detail, 20 years ago, 58% of the study's subjects said that they attended arts shows because they would like to see famous performers and artists. This figure, then, has almost remained unchanged by the end of the research with the percentage being around 55%. By contrast, going arts events for work and business is the least popular among these. At the beginning of the study, only 6 percent of UK adults attented art events because of this reason. The next 20 years have witnessed a considerable increase with the proportion going up to 10 percent at the time of 10 years ago and 11 percent by now.

In addition, UK adults also go to arts shows to watch their children. Suprisingly, this reason has become much more common, Being just under 10 percent and 15 percent at the time of 20 years ago and 10 years ago respectively, the number of UK adults accompanying their children make up 24% of the total by today. Finally, people take part in art events if they are special occasions or celebrations. 20 years ago, it was relatively common with over a quarter of respondants mentioning this reason, but it has decreased steadily and drmatically by two thirds to just 9 percent by today, making it the least popular, even behind the reason of "work and busniess" at the end of the study.

vuthaihoa74

Oct 31, 2019

Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK1: the changes in the number of people who went to and came from the UK for travel [3]

@ChrisChen I hope my comment would be helpful
Your introsuction is relatively simple and poor in vocab, my introduction would be " The line chart given compares the number of UK visitors who travelled abroad and the number of counterparts from other countries whose destination was UK during the period from 1979 to 1999. Meanwhile, the bar chart lists a number of countries widely-enjoyed by UK people and their popularity".

vuthaihoa74

Oct 31, 2019

Writing Feedback / In the chart numbers of waste that were produced by Ireland, Japan, Korea, Poland, Portugal, and US [4]

@wuu_u
To be honest, there are quite a lot of mistakes in your writing.
As for grammar, in addition to what shown in chrischen's comment, i think there is a mistake about tense which is " which is from from 28 to 53 million tonnes". Remember we are talking about the past. Also, i think you don't need to add "which is", just "from 28 to 53 million tonnes" is enough.

As for the ideas, i think adding the information about Korean from 1990 to 2000 is redundant and makes it not fit with the US figure. You should put your first paragraph and the second one into just one paragraph.

vuthaihoa74

Oct 31, 2019

Writing Feedback / Ielts writing task 1, visitors' evaluation about Bowen Island [6]

@roswita116
thanks for your help, but there are some points in your comment i need you to explain more clearly::
First, there is no "show" in the introduction. I just use "provide".
Second, I follow the structure that is recommended in a textbook in ielts writting, so i put the "introduction sentence" and "overall view" in the firsy graph. and i think my essay shows enough information about proportion.

vuthaihoa74

Oct 27, 2019

Writing Feedback / Ielts writing task 1, visitors' evaluation about Bowen Island [6]

@Maria
thank you very much, your comment is very useful to me. I will take your advice for the next times. Could you please give a mark for my writting? Thanks

vuthaihoa74

Oct 25, 2019

Writing Feedback / Ielts writing task 1, visitors' evaluation about Bowen Island [6]

advantages and disadvantages of Bowen Island

The two pie charts given provides evaluation of visitors who come to Bowen Island in terms of their satisfaction and disatisfation about common features of this islands.It is clear that according to visitors' opinions there are as many disadvatages as advantages.

With regard to negative feedbacks, high cost of living is by far the most prominent factor that is considered as disadvantage by half of the tourists. Meanwhile, a quarter of people coming to this island for tourism are not much keen on entertainment service. The remaining 25% show criticism on weather (15%) and "food quality" (10%).

As for positive features visitors are really fond of the local with more than 40% of good feedbacks. This is followed by the scenery with satisfaction from 35% of tourists. Good accomodation and culture are the least common advantages with just over one tenth of tourists (for each factor) saying they are satisfied.

It is also interesting to note that although the cost of living is expensive, most of the visitors give good mark to inherent beauties of this island such as culture, people, unspoilt nature rather than foods and entertainment.