Posts by nsliwa

nsliwa

Nov 29, 2019

Undergraduate / Importance of Baseball - UBC Application [3]

Hi! I am also applying to UBC from Ontario and I wish you the best of luck!

You seem to have gotten the gist of what the question is asking of you but I would recommend expanding further upon change; how did your teammates teach you the things they taught you? I would also recommend working on your sentence structure in order to improve clarity, there were some sentences which I had to reread to understand, while on the other hand, much of your last paragraph feels choppy.

nsliwa

Nov 29, 2019

Writing Feedback / Translation of an article about remote work. (Needs revision) [5]

@Nasridean
Hi! I hope you find my feedback useful.

I'm not sure who the audience of your writing is but I would recommend some grammatical edits to improve clarity and formality. For example try to avoid the use of contractions (ex. shouldn't) and beginning sentences with conjunctions. "it is almost impossible" could become "it is near impossible" and "In early ..." could be changed to "... to Russia after nearly two months of absence; last year he was unavailable for almost six months." Also, if you avoided starting sentences with words such as "So" it would make your tone more assertive/certain. Your use of quotations validities your information, however, I agree with the previous comment in that the idea you seem to be trying to express is a bit confusing, if your piece is more about business travel rather than remote work than it would not make sense to have your introduction focused on remote work.

nsliwa

Nov 27, 2019

Undergraduate / Struggling to Answer - UBC Personal Profile question - WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO YOU AND WHY [2]

I am hoping to submit an application to UBC for first round offers, which means I have to submit it by December 1st. I am really struggling to answer the Personal Profile questions without sounding too boring or too boastful. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

What is important to you? And why?

(maximum 250 words)

I have always been quite shy and eager to please. Trying to do as much as I could, I believed that more was better. I cared too much about appearing perfect and would spread myself too thin in an attempt to prove that I was strong, when really I was too scared to accept that I was hurting myself. The line between determination or passion and being stubborn was too blurred, and I refused to accept that. I took anything that was not perfect as a failure and it was only when the failures became the norm that I was willing to admit I needed help. Over time I limited my participation in clubs to those I truly cared about and I was finally able to allow myself to switch from IB Diploma to Certificate. I felt weak and cowardly until I started to think about how I would never dare think this way about other people. Through applying the optimism and kindness I granted everyone else to myself I was able to accept failures as opportunities for learning and growth. Focusing on what I cared about most allowed me to better commit myself to causes important to me and hone the skills I needed. The thing that I am most proud of is not something I can look at it nor something that everyone will recognize; it is not an award but rather an achievement. The thing that I am most proud of is my ability to change.