Woxic_145
Jul 22, 2020
Writing Feedback / [IELTS WRITING TASK 2] The world is heavily dependent on oil for energy [2]
Hi,
I am currently practicing writing IELTS TASK 2, and please help me to improve my essay below.
your feedback is appreciated :)
The world is heavily dependent on oil for energy, which is unsustainable due to global warming. What future resource do you think will take oil's place? Why do you think this?
Most would agree that oil will not remain the world's main energy source indefinitely. With major breakthoughs in humanity's ability to harvest power from the sun, I believe that solar power will one day become a healthier and cheaper alternative to petrol. This will be shown viable by looking at the positive impact of solar energy on the environment and how its price has decreased.
Firstly, solar energy is environmentally friendly. Since solar panels convert energy from sunlight into electricity, solar farms do not produce air pollution, water pollution or greenhouse gases. This is a significant advantage compared with oil and coal because fossil fuel combustion for electricity generation produces a huge amount of global warming emissions such as carbon dioxide. Using solar wafers to harvest the sun's energy could eliminate global warming as it leads to a decrease in the demand for thermal energy, therefore curtails carbon emission released. Such benefit to the environment illustrates why solar energy is fit to take over oil as the world's top energy source.
Secondly, as solar technology develops it is becoming a much cheaper energy source. Several developments in solar cell structure have dramatically boosted their efficiency, meaning that they are capable of producing much more electricity from the sun. This results in the falling price of solar energy, while the price of oil energy is estimated to keep rising because current oil fields are becoming exhausted. As people are driven by price, it is clear how solar energy will take the place of oil as humanity's next major energy resource.
In conclusion, despite the fact that humanity is still reliant on oil for energy, this dependent will not last long because of global warming. In my opinion, the solar power's positive effect on the environment and its falling price make it a great alternative to oil in the foreseeable future.
Oil dependency
Hi,
I am currently practicing writing IELTS TASK 2, and please help me to improve my essay below.
your feedback is appreciated :)
The world is heavily dependent on oil for energy, which is unsustainable due to global warming. What future resource do you think will take oil's place? Why do you think this?
Most would agree that oil will not remain the world's main energy source indefinitely. With major breakthoughs in humanity's ability to harvest power from the sun, I believe that solar power will one day become a healthier and cheaper alternative to petrol. This will be shown viable by looking at the positive impact of solar energy on the environment and how its price has decreased.
Firstly, solar energy is environmentally friendly. Since solar panels convert energy from sunlight into electricity, solar farms do not produce air pollution, water pollution or greenhouse gases. This is a significant advantage compared with oil and coal because fossil fuel combustion for electricity generation produces a huge amount of global warming emissions such as carbon dioxide. Using solar wafers to harvest the sun's energy could eliminate global warming as it leads to a decrease in the demand for thermal energy, therefore curtails carbon emission released. Such benefit to the environment illustrates why solar energy is fit to take over oil as the world's top energy source.
Secondly, as solar technology develops it is becoming a much cheaper energy source. Several developments in solar cell structure have dramatically boosted their efficiency, meaning that they are capable of producing much more electricity from the sun. This results in the falling price of solar energy, while the price of oil energy is estimated to keep rising because current oil fields are becoming exhausted. As people are driven by price, it is clear how solar energy will take the place of oil as humanity's next major energy resource.
In conclusion, despite the fact that humanity is still reliant on oil for energy, this dependent will not last long because of global warming. In my opinion, the solar power's positive effect on the environment and its falling price make it a great alternative to oil in the foreseeable future.
