Writing Feedback / Museums in London and tourists - IELTS writing part 1 (bar chart) [5]

It's a great essay anyway. May I suggest to correct the overview paragraph because it is not comprehensive in some aspects yet. Probably you could mention if the trend is upward in three to four months earlier and the last two months they declined dramatically.

Writing Feedback / IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - BAR CHART: Shares of expenditures for selected categories [4]

It is a great essay anyway you should make the numbers count properly. I found it contains more than 200 words. Your overview paragraph (2nd) could be reduced by only including 1 sentence, because 2 are a little risky. I do agree that the details should contain in 2 paragraphs by comparing 2 different variables. Considering the 4th paragraph I think we should avoid kind of comparing like "one in every five people" because it doesnt really explain in the chart. However the using of 21%, 17%, and 21% should not be attached in, we dont really know the exact number from the diagram do we? It's more appropriate to use more than 25% or 15% or using number the diagram mentioned.