Undergraduate / volunteering at a summer school - Waterloo AIF - Question #2 [3]

It would be great of i could get some advice on the tone of the answer, as well as if it feels wordy, and lastly if it answers the question well. thanks

2. Briefly describe a group, organization, or community that you have been involved in, are a member of, and/or have contributed to. What contributions have you made as a member of this group? Were you able to lead, influence others and/or influence decisions for the good of the group and its goals? How has your involvement helped make this community better? (900-character limit)

During grades 10 and 11, I volunteered at my local mosque's summer school. The program was designed for children aged 7-14. The organizers mostly taught the younger children leaving the middle schoolers to the volunteers. My job was to teach math to the grade 7-8 kids. In my first year I didn't take on a leadership role because of my lack of experience, however, this summer I became more proactive. For instance, when we were behind schedule, I convinced the other volunteers to adjust the break time so the students could recharge before doing their work again. Additionally, I talked to the volunteers about giving work that fits a child's understanding instead of their grade level so they could learn the basics before going onto more advanced topics. This change led to the program being more efficient and effective for the students, which will help them in their long-term success.

Undergraduate / A passion for computers - Waterloo Engineer Application - Question #1 [2]

1. Tell us about a passion or strong interest of yours. How [and when] did you become involved in this interest [and for how long have you been involved]? What have you learned about yourself from this interest? How will you apply this knowledge as a student at the University of Waterloo? (900-character limit)
(In case its important this is specifically for electrical engineering)

My passion for computers was ignited in a grade 10 computer engineering class where we had to make a presentation about a specific computer component. When I was researching these components I found it fascinating how something could make so much progress in such a short amount of time relative to other human achievements. However after I did my presentation I stopped learning about computers, even though I was interested in learning more. Through this experience I learned of a shortcoming that I had, I was lazy. While doing some self reflection I realised just how much ambition I lacked. Because of this I decided to change my approach on learning to become more engaged in my interests, in and out of class, which I've been working on ever since. I believe this mindset will help as a student of Waterloo because I will have the drive, as well as the knowledge to excel in every aspect of my studies.