Undergraduate / My beloved laptop just decided that its very last day has come;Self-Description Essay [12]

On the whole, I think it's a good one, but you might want to mention just what your original essay was about. A few words would probably suffice, but I, as the reader, was curious about that as I read it.

3 spelling mistakes that I noticed (but my first language is not English so please keep looking in case I missed other ones):

fourth of July (with U)- but you could simply write 4th
"paid off" (with two "f"s)
an what you want to accomplish in "life" not "live" because the latter is the verb version (at the end of the 5th paragraph)

You might have already noticed this but I thought I would register here to be able to post you this answer just in case you haven't.

Hope this helped (Gosh, I wish I had my essay finished by now.)