Undergraduate / 'Hard to make' - the admission essay about good friendship [4]

I want to revise my essay. Can anybody help me?

Friendship

Have you ever thought a good friendship is too hard to make? In my past, I used to think I would never have any problems with my friends until I came to US. Evaluating myself, I believe that I'm not a mean friend; otherwise, I'm always willing to help friends who are in trouble. As an international student, I really need friends to help each other in case we meet with difficulties. However, after 1 year in America, I changed my mind. I met two kinds of friends, and both of them gave me an experience: To make friends with somebody is easy, but it's too hard to get close to them. The experience made me grow up and be more independent than I thought I could be.

I remembered the day I had come to US for studying is September 14, 2006. I didn't depart alone. I met many Vietnamese students who also studied at Highline on the same fight. It made me feel happier and relieved my mind. I would have friends in the new environment. We lived in the dormitory, helped new comers like me to adapt in new life because they used to be exchange students, and had dinner together. I thought I was lucky at the beginning of my studying. They became my magnetic needle and I depended much on them. For example, when I opened a bank account, I had to ask them go with me; or I registered for the same class with them although we are not the same major...Three months later, all of us moved out. I thought that living with friends was not easy because everybody has each personality. So I carefully chose the friends whom I was close to.

We were 7 people living in a 4- bedroom house. At the first time, we were similar to close- knit family. Day by day we had some small arguments. As the oldest person, I used to make concessions to them. I thought the problems would be solved soon. In contrast, the more I try to heal all sorrows, the more they opposed me. They usually spoke against me behind my back, irritated and play unfair with me. I felt to be isolated in the house and be very upset at that time. Now everything I did by myself. I bought food, went shopping, and came to school alone. They didn't talk to me anymore...

At school, I had a few new friends who just came to Highline in winter 2007. After knowing my problems, they encouraged and helped me a lot. When I moved out to live with host family, the old friends seemed to be happy. They didn't help me although they are boys and I'm a girl. They stood and looked at me while I was carrying the heavy luggage. Fortunately, the new friends came late but they helped me to move my luggage and stuff. They also assisted me to arrange stuff in my new room. Now they are still my best friends. I want to send to them a thank you message.

When I look back on my last year, I realized that I grew up after this experience." A true friend will support you even if the whole world opposes you" ( Friendship- Mohatta). In my opinion, I couldn't agree with this statement any more. Friendship will be need time to determine who is a good friend or a bad friend. I also become independent. I don't need to live with someone who takes care of me. Now I feel happier. I passed my big problem: culture shock because of bad friends. I can concentrate on my study a lot. Doing something by myself makes me confident and self control. That is also the reason why my parent allowed me to study abroad. They want me become an independent girl.

Although I felt hurt with this experience, I'm glad that now I'm a mature woman. I can do what I need and don't care much other people's thought. Just do the things I think are right bravely. "We are all travelers in the wilderness of the world, and the best that we can find in our travels is an honest friend", Robert Louis Stevenson. Friends will be a part of our life and be careful to choose! This is the strong point of view I learned from my experience