gingerpopo
Mar 7, 2010
Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay -250words - Technology Progression has a negative impact on us? [3]
hi your essay is a good one i wanna take ielts exam in 3 month i'm not expert but according to ace ielts book if your essay body changed a little it became more interesting see this example below:
"Home schooling belongs to the past and is unacceptable in the modern society.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
example:
Everything has two sides and home schooling is not an exception. In the past it
seemed like the most natural way of educating the children, but today many
people criticize it.(u agree with the second part)
We must acknowledge that parents know their children best. That gives them a
good chance of knowing how to make child understand certain concepts. Using
child's interests, parents can make a process of learning more enjoyable and
effective. In addition, being at home makes child feel safe, which contributes to
his ability to concentrate on studying.(u write about side that u disagree)
Nevertheless, many people believe that teaching should be done by professionals.
There are many proven scientific approaches that produce good results and
without those techniques parents who teach their kids at home have no chance of
success. Associative learning is a good example of such a technique. Showing the
child images while learning the alphabet (apple for "a", boy for "b") makes him
or her remember the letters faster and easier.
Also not every parent is capable of teaching his or her child at home because the
blind can not lead the blind. Parents can not teach the children something they
don't know themselves, and let's face it - not all of us have profound knowledge of
history or geography even on a school textbook level. Eventually, even those
mums and dads who had succeeded at school could forget the material as the time
went by.(examples about side u agree)
In conclusion, I have more trust in abilities and experience of professional
teachers then I do in my own.
hi your essay is a good one i wanna take ielts exam in 3 month i'm not expert but according to ace ielts book if your essay body changed a little it became more interesting see this example below:
"Home schooling belongs to the past and is unacceptable in the modern society.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
example:
Everything has two sides and home schooling is not an exception. In the past it
seemed like the most natural way of educating the children, but today many
people criticize it.(u agree with the second part)
We must acknowledge that parents know their children best. That gives them a
good chance of knowing how to make child understand certain concepts. Using
child's interests, parents can make a process of learning more enjoyable and
effective. In addition, being at home makes child feel safe, which contributes to
his ability to concentrate on studying.(u write about side that u disagree)
Nevertheless, many people believe that teaching should be done by professionals.
There are many proven scientific approaches that produce good results and
without those techniques parents who teach their kids at home have no chance of
success. Associative learning is a good example of such a technique. Showing the
child images while learning the alphabet (apple for "a", boy for "b") makes him
or her remember the letters faster and easier.
Also not every parent is capable of teaching his or her child at home because the
blind can not lead the blind. Parents can not teach the children something they
don't know themselves, and let's face it - not all of us have profound knowledge of
history or geography even on a school textbook level. Eventually, even those
mums and dads who had succeeded at school could forget the material as the time
went by.(examples about side u agree)
In conclusion, I have more trust in abilities and experience of professional
teachers then I do in my own.