Poetry / sense of touch and sense of smell [6]

We are covering how to use the five senses to make vivid and creative descriptions, and we are dedicating a poem to each of the five senses. Thus, these poems must emphasize the use of the required sense. Poems can be written in any style.

My Assagnment is to write 2 poems: one dedicated to the sense of touch and the other dedicated to the sense of scent.

Here is my first one that I would like feedback on: (two versions of touch poem)

Five frosty tingling fingers
stiff as icicles
cold as death
struggle to emerge from their encasement
in multicolored mittens
hard as concrete
Longing to snuggle a
silky smooth steaming mug
of sweet strawberry cocoa.

Five frosty fingers
Tingle like pins and needles
stiff as icicles
cold as death
Struggle to emerge from multicolored mittens
Encased in winters' concrete
Longing to snuggle a
silky smooth mug
of steaming hot sweet strawberry cocoa.