Undergraduate / Don't be shocked when you see her name...! Common App essay [5]

Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence.

Please be harsh, all I want is improvement :) Thanks

"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops." My English teacher, Miss Crowley, is an inspiration who opens her students' hearts and minds leading them to a bright future. Most students comment that she is eccentric, performing dramatically in class and using exaggeration to get across her message. It is through her kookiness that we learned more profoundly during our lessons.

As an international student coming to U.S. in my junior year, I knew nothing about the country. No matter how affable I was to others, English interfered with my communication. Miss Crowley had the insight to understand the difficulties I encountered, inviting me to join the study group that she held. Months passed and I built friendships by sharing cultural experiences with the people in the study group. During the class, Miss Crowley purposely raised up debates or discussion that engendered a flow of excitement and mental stimulation. Gradually, I established a sense of belonging in the school community.

Aside from her concern for foreign students like me, Miss Crowley models appropriate behaviors and manners for all of her students. She expects students to be well behaved and disciplined. Many students have become used to being disrespectful and casual; nevertheless, Miss Crowley holds us to a higher standard. Some classmates criticized her fastidiousness. However, she has our best interests in mind. I appreciate her courage to oppose negative attitudes and correct them. Although her actions aroused student dissent, she was indeed teaching them a basic sense of propriety.

Miss Crowley has dedicated her entire life to teaching. In high school, students of the age to receive a driving license. By reminding students of the potential dangers of drunk driving, she has taught us a valuable life lesson by telling us a heart-broken true story. A senior student who went to the senior prom got drunk with his friends, and he killed himself by crashing his car to a truck. No one knew how devastated she was at his funeral. Instead, she consciously overcame all students in hope of preventing another tragedy. After I heard her tell this story, I promised myself that I would keep a sense of alertness no matter what I might encounter in the future.

I embraced every moment with Miss Crowley. In 48 minutes per day, I learned more than I could imagine about society and shaping my style. She will never know how much she has influenced me.

Undergraduate / "What? Environmentalist? Or a tree hugger?" UC prompt [5]

Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations. Please do give some feedbacks no matter they are good or bad. Thanks B-)

I enjoy a joyous life. Having a carefree childhood, without economic burden, attending a school with strong reputation...I know my family has always provided the best for me. Although I have those advantages, I was aware of the world beyond myself.

Some stereotypes of Chinese parents suggest that they are rigorous, making their children repress their own wills and emotions. However, my parents never pressured me and let me make my own decisions. They believe that I am mature enough for the consequences. At home, we always debate about social issues like politics and scandals. It is the most exciting family time for me, because the debate stimulates my critical thinking and a sense of awareness of global and social matters. From an early age, my parents encouraged me to think deeply. When I was 8, I read The Mystery of Sun, which described the formation of planets. I was obsessed with the amazing universe after reading. Since then, I have continued to strengthen my understanding, not only by reading and watching BBC shows, but also by involving myself in civic activities.

Every year since I was 12, I have participated in Hong Kong Youth workers' Summit. We usually discussed local issues so as to arouse teenagers' awareness of the society. One year we discussed environmental policy and global warming. We shared different approaches to solving to the same dilemma as other countries encounter. I learned that the issue of environmental problem is worldwide. The summit has strengthened my awareness to the world. I did not realize at the time that the summit was leading me to my passion: conserving and protecting the environment.

As my interest in environment protection increased, my attention was drawn to my immediate surroundings. Hong Kong is an extremely polluted area with a humid and warm climate. The pollutants, being released by vehicles, factories and air conditioners, are trapped in this small city. In certain situations, people can observe the dust particles floating in the air. Water pollution is a serious problem too. Although there is a law prohibiting trash dumping into the harbor, practically no one follows it. On the academic side, the universities do not categorize environmental science as an individual major; they limit the interest and opportunities for students. Disappointed in the failure of the environmental education program in Hong Kong; I moved to the U.S. I believe U.S. is better focused on environmental science and allocates more resources to this course.

Leaving my hometown and starting a new life was not easy. I used to have a hard time overcoming homesickness. Nonetheless, I appreciate the people who support and encourage me to move on. Being on environmental protector is no longer idealist; now I am one step closer to my dream.