Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence.
Please be harsh, all I want is improvement :) Thanks
"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops." My English teacher, Miss Crowley, is an inspiration who opens her students' hearts and minds leading them to a bright future. Most students comment that she is eccentric, performing dramatically in class and using exaggeration to get across her message. It is through her kookiness that we learned more profoundly during our lessons.
As an international student coming to U.S. in my junior year, I knew nothing about the country. No matter how affable I was to others, English interfered with my communication. Miss Crowley had the insight to understand the difficulties I encountered, inviting me to join the study group that she held. Months passed and I built friendships by sharing cultural experiences with the people in the study group. During the class, Miss Crowley purposely raised up debates or discussion that engendered a flow of excitement and mental stimulation. Gradually, I established a sense of belonging in the school community.
Aside from her concern for foreign students like me, Miss Crowley models appropriate behaviors and manners for all of her students. She expects students to be well behaved and disciplined. Many students have become used to being disrespectful and casual; nevertheless, Miss Crowley holds us to a higher standard. Some classmates criticized her fastidiousness. However, she has our best interests in mind. I appreciate her courage to oppose negative attitudes and correct them. Although her actions aroused student dissent, she was indeed teaching them a basic sense of propriety.
Miss Crowley has dedicated her entire life to teaching. In high school, students of the age to receive a driving license. By reminding students of the potential dangers of drunk driving, she has taught us a valuable life lesson by telling us a heart-broken true story. A senior student who went to the senior prom got drunk with his friends, and he killed himself by crashing his car to a truck. No one knew how devastated she was at his funeral. Instead, she consciously overcame all students in hope of preventing another tragedy. After I heard her tell this story, I promised myself that I would keep a sense of alertness no matter what I might encounter in the future.
I embraced every moment with Miss Crowley. In 48 minutes per day, I learned more than I could imagine about society and shaping my style. She will never know how much she has influenced me.
"In high school, students of the age to receive a driving license. "
awkward
heart-broken, true story.
48 --> forty-eight
he killed himself by crashing his car into a truck.
The last sentence is a little awkward. Is there a real reason why she would never know how much she influenced you?
I am not sure, I bet she never knows ;)
The last sentence I simply want to recall my quotation at the beginning
I didn't think much about it~
Any feedback? Thanks<3
What do you think of this topic? Is it boring or what? Fill free to give any feedback :0
I don't think English interfered. It was "limited English" that interfered.
Months passed, a nd I built friendships by ...
By Reminding students of the potential dangers of drunk driving, she has taught us a valuable life lesson by telling us a heart-broken a heartbreaking, true story. A senior student who went to the senior prom got drunk with his friends, and he killed himself by crashing his car to a truck. No one knew how devastated she was at his funeral.
Instead, she consciously overcame all students in hope of preventing another tragedy. This sentence does not make sense.
This is all very well written. What is the main point you want to make about her? If the reader remembers only one thing, what should it be? Whatever it is, mention it at the beginning and also at the end.
