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Posts by writingapps
Joined: Nov 25, 2010
Last Post: Nov 26, 2010
Threads: 1
Posts: 6  

From: united States of America

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writingapps   
Nov 26, 2010
Undergraduate / "going to prom-a Zombie Prom" - Tulane Personal Statement, experience [10]

thank you guys for the criticism. they're all appreciated.
I am working on revising them right now. Also, do you think this statement can be recycled in the UC person statement #2? (Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?)
writingapps   
Nov 25, 2010
Undergraduate / "going to prom-a Zombie Prom" - Tulane Personal Statement, experience [10]

This is the prompt: Using the space below, please write between 250 and 500 words to describe a special interest, significant experience or achievement, or anything else that has special meaning to you or had a significant influence on you.

& I have written the following. I just needed some feedback. Thanks! Feel free to give your harshest criticism if necessary.

I am going to prom-a Zombie Prom.

Being the shy girl standing in the back wall of the class was my daily routine back in elementary school. When I moved back to California from South Korea, my English was incomparable to my peers. I always used the incorrect verb tenses, and spoke with the typical fresh off the boat Asian accent. When my classmates were attending extravagant birthday bashes, I was crouching over my desk at home, studying fiercely for the weekly spelling tests. Overcoming my shyness was deemed impossible.

"Make sure to check which elective you would like to take next year!" Those were the words a student council representative announced as he passed around the course sign-up sheets for middle school. There were five elective choices, none of which I was too ecstatic to enroll in. Without giving any more thoughts regarding those classes, a check-mark for the drama class was drawn and the paper was turned in.

The memory of standing on the blinding stage for the first time to recite a simple tongue twister lingers in my mind. The feeling of everyone's eyes on you, the applause after the performance, and the kind critique from the teacher, I loved every moment of it. I had finally found my niche, and from that day on, I was a thespian.

When the news of the high school theatre department opening their audition to all ages reached my ears, my new-found theatre god urged me to go for it. The result? I was the youngest member in the cast.

Theatre arts and I were joined at the hips like best friends. I was rehearsing religiously-after school, before dinner, and before bed. Being cast in Zombie Prom was the final ingredient needed change my life. When I slithered into my vibrant poodle skirt, I transformed into a different person-a person no one dared to judge. My confidence level boosted, staying silent became almost too hard to accomplish, and I gained friends I can also call my role models. Theatre transformed me into a social butterfly.

However, people around me whispered amongst themselves that it was impossible for an Asian to be in the school's productions. My former self would have crawled into another hole; I was different now. The negatives were tossed aside and I was cast in shows repeatedly. My parts consisted of minor characters, but no role of small in my dictionary.

After all these years, my passion for the theatre arts has not withered. I still get the same butterflies and adrenaline rush when I stand on stage. I am not afraid of expressing myself anymore. I am not afraid.
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