Undergraduate / My parents and education - my world [4]

Teaching me [needs comma here] his favorite past time[ comma here] was just another thing that added to my knowledge.

In you conclusion, you need to conclude your essay, not summarize your essay.

Maybe in your essay you should talk more about the world you come from, then describe some of the differences between Mexico and where you live now?

Talk more about how you wanted to improve, why you wanted to improve?

Hoped this helped!

Undergraduate / "My grandma" (world I come from) + "Mind games" (personal quality/talent) [3]

in your UC essay 2 I think you need to go back and answer
What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
because you say it, but I think you're essay needs evolve around more what you are proud about rather than just the story.

You need to state why you are proud and how it makes you proud