Yuchenli
Dec 21, 2010
Undergraduate / "My obsession for science and my competitve nature" - Cellular Respiration [3]
thanks!
thanks!
Yuchenli
Dec 21, 2010
Undergraduate / "Jeffrey Sachs" - Why Columbia Supplement [6]
I like it, very good in explaining "why columbia". But I am getting a little feeling that the reason that you are choosing columbia is solely due to the fact that Mr.Sach, who is affiliated with Columbia, possess certain qualities and ideologies that you wish to have in Columbia. Maybe choosing a school based on the ideology of one professor is a bit insufficient. Your essay can be greatly improved (in my opinion) by including a broader reasons why you enjoy columbia as a whole, not just one professor :)
I like it, very good in explaining "why columbia". But I am getting a little feeling that the reason that you are choosing columbia is solely due to the fact that Mr.Sach, who is affiliated with Columbia, possess certain qualities and ideologies that you wish to have in Columbia. Maybe choosing a school based on the ideology of one professor is a bit insufficient. Your essay can be greatly improved (in my opinion) by including a broader reasons why you enjoy columbia as a whole, not just one professor :)
Yuchenli
Dec 21, 2010
Undergraduate / The game of "Steal the Bacon" -Common APP Topic of Choice Essay [4]
I get how you are trying to convey that sense that you are only motivated to do things that you like. But maybe you can emphasize on incidences where you are greatly interested and motivated and contrast that event with the one you have described in your essay. Perhaps that would do the trick.
I get how you are trying to convey that sense that you are only motivated to do things that you like. But maybe you can emphasize on incidences where you are greatly interested and motivated and contrast that event with the one you have described in your essay. Perhaps that would do the trick.
Yuchenli
Dec 20, 2010
Undergraduate / "new perspectives and fresh ingredients" - CommonApp- Topic of Your Choice [4]
hey I really liked your essay, it is unique. Here is a little suggestion for the phrase in your first paragraph, They lie in chaos; they are combined in chaos, the very essence of the seven years I spent in India maybe you can change the word chaos to a slightly more positive connotated word instead, that might better convey your idea.
hey I really liked your essay, it is unique. Here is a little suggestion for the phrase in your first paragraph, They lie in chaos; they are combined in chaos, the very essence of the seven years I spent in India maybe you can change the word chaos to a slightly more positive connotated word instead, that might better convey your idea.
Yuchenli
Dec 20, 2010
Undergraduate / "My obsession for science and my competitve nature" - Cellular Respiration [3]
Here I was, upside down. My head laying on the middle of the bed and my legs arching over the wall closeby. On my hands was the crumped Bio notes, which I have printed out. The exam was the next day, I scanned over the diagrams of Cellular Respiration to make sure that its main concepts were understood
The main goal of cellular respiration is to convert biochemical energy in the form of ATP, which can utilized by the cell. Substrate phosphrylation is a type of chemical reaction that results in direct formation of ATP, the amount of ATP produced is only a small portion of the total energy generated.
At age of 7, I was in my first year elementary school. Oneday, the teacher passed out a note to every student in my class. Each note had a name of an job. Everyone had to role-play the job that he/she picked. As I uncrumped my paper, the word "doctor" revealed into sight. And that was my first encounterance to the world of science. I put on the oversized white coat and the plastic toy stethoscope, and pretended to diagnose my classmates. At the end of the day, the class voted on who acted their role the best. I was chosen.
This marked the beginning of my obsession for science
I was in grade four. During recess, when my classmates were-- out playing basketball, I would always remain in the caffeteria, with only the gigantic science encyclopedia to accompany me. The reason that I enjoyed science was because I exceled at it. My friends called me "science genius", and I strived hard to live up to their expectations.
Soon afterwards, I moved to Canada with my family. Despite changes in the weather and location, my obsession for science continued. In my new science class, I endeavored to be the best ,to win the repect of my classmates, like how I did ever since I was seven. I achieved the highest mark in the course two years later.
Apart from substration phosphorylation, most of ATP come from an indirect metabolic pathway, oxidation phosphorylation. These steps might not be so obviously seen, but they are one of the most important concepts in cellular respiration.
My grandfather fell ill when I was in my junior, and soon lost his battle against the wrath of cancer. I have heard of deaths before, but this one struck me the most. It happened to someone that was important to me. Seeing the gradual degraduation of my grandfather's vitality and eventual depletion of his health was the most excruciating part.
My obsession for science had been driven by my competitve nature and the desire to be the best amongst my classmates. But at that momment, I have somehow realized that I have missed the point. Seeing my grandfather laying helplessly on the hospital bed, struggling to gasp for air, I knew that my own perception of science was shallow. I took pride in all of the achievements and recognitions I earned, but I failed to see the big picture. The awards hanging on the walls are like substrate phosphorylation in cellular respiration, playing only a trivial part in the whole process. It is the indirect, but signficant experiences encountered in life that generate the true motivation.
I was also that cellular respiration on that crumbled Bio note, fixed only on the process of substrate phosphorylation, where all the goodies (ATPs) are produced. But little did I know that there was another mechanism beneath, that would drive me more efficiently.
Here I was, upside down. My head laying on the middle of the bed and my legs arching over the wall closeby. On my hands was the crumped Bio notes, which I have printed out. The exam was the next day, I scanned over the diagrams of Cellular Respiration to make sure that its main concepts were understood
The main goal of cellular respiration is to convert biochemical energy in the form of ATP, which can utilized by the cell. Substrate phosphrylation is a type of chemical reaction that results in direct formation of ATP, the amount of ATP produced is only a small portion of the total energy generated.
At age of 7, I was in my first year elementary school. Oneday, the teacher passed out a note to every student in my class. Each note had a name of an job. Everyone had to role-play the job that he/she picked. As I uncrumped my paper, the word "doctor" revealed into sight. And that was my first encounterance to the world of science. I put on the oversized white coat and the plastic toy stethoscope, and pretended to diagnose my classmates. At the end of the day, the class voted on who acted their role the best. I was chosen.
This marked the beginning of my obsession for science
I was in grade four. During recess, when my classmates were-- out playing basketball, I would always remain in the caffeteria, with only the gigantic science encyclopedia to accompany me. The reason that I enjoyed science was because I exceled at it. My friends called me "science genius", and I strived hard to live up to their expectations.
Soon afterwards, I moved to Canada with my family. Despite changes in the weather and location, my obsession for science continued. In my new science class, I endeavored to be the best ,to win the repect of my classmates, like how I did ever since I was seven. I achieved the highest mark in the course two years later.
Apart from substration phosphorylation, most of ATP come from an indirect metabolic pathway, oxidation phosphorylation. These steps might not be so obviously seen, but they are one of the most important concepts in cellular respiration.
My grandfather fell ill when I was in my junior, and soon lost his battle against the wrath of cancer. I have heard of deaths before, but this one struck me the most. It happened to someone that was important to me. Seeing the gradual degraduation of my grandfather's vitality and eventual depletion of his health was the most excruciating part.
My obsession for science had been driven by my competitve nature and the desire to be the best amongst my classmates. But at that momment, I have somehow realized that I have missed the point. Seeing my grandfather laying helplessly on the hospital bed, struggling to gasp for air, I knew that my own perception of science was shallow. I took pride in all of the achievements and recognitions I earned, but I failed to see the big picture. The awards hanging on the walls are like substrate phosphorylation in cellular respiration, playing only a trivial part in the whole process. It is the indirect, but signficant experiences encountered in life that generate the true motivation.
I was also that cellular respiration on that crumbled Bio note, fixed only on the process of substrate phosphorylation, where all the goodies (ATPs) are produced. But little did I know that there was another mechanism beneath, that would drive me more efficiently.