jennifer92
Jan 12, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS : government spend money on old buildings or new buildings. agree, disagee? [3]
This my first essay in preparing for ielts. I really need to practice a lot of writing since writing is one of my weakness, moreover i have difficulty to find the synonym or formal word to write in essay. I want to obtain at least 6.5 score in writing.Hope you can give some feedbacks :)
thanks a lot!
[Topic]
Governments spend an enormous amount of money on renovations of old buildings in large cities. Some believe that this money is better be spent on building new houses and road development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
[Answer]
Nowadays, governments attempted to discharge the overwhelming fees to build new constructions in order to achieve a better living throughtout the year. Nonetheless, they have tendency to always focused on enhance many of construction instead of repairing the old facilities. There are some following reason which is government have to spend their money to renovate the old buildings.
Firstly, old buildings are seen as a neglected buildings in the middle of city. It is inevitable, some of the old buildings conditioncontinued to deteriorated moreover it become ruins which not able to seen in original form. Furthermore, living near the old buildings can become a hazardous place to live. To illustrate, some of the buildings have no longer to stand firmly in view of the fact that the building structure simply does not support it, therefore inhabitants who live in modern house surround it is really risky. Secondly, Apart from its unique architecture, the building also represent inheritance of the past times. Due to its historical, the old age buildings have more art values than modern buildings. Thirdly, the buildings have been stood in land thus government does not have to spent extra expenses to expand the area to build more constructions.
In contrast, in order to building new houses , government should have to harness the new lands for a new development. Although developing the road can help the inhabitants a lot , it really spend enormous amount of money to finish the development whereas the development of old building is more economical.
In conclusion, government have to conserve the old building first, after that they are able to take a good maintenence of the other development. Lastlly, with the old buildings existence, the young generation have respectful to old history.
(word count:291)
This my first essay in preparing for ielts. I really need to practice a lot of writing since writing is one of my weakness, moreover i have difficulty to find the synonym or formal word to write in essay. I want to obtain at least 6.5 score in writing.Hope you can give some feedbacks :)
thanks a lot!
[Topic]
Governments spend an enormous amount of money on renovations of old buildings in large cities. Some believe that this money is better be spent on building new houses and road development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
[Answer]
Nowadays, governments attempted to discharge the overwhelming fees to build new constructions in order to achieve a better living throughtout the year. Nonetheless, they have tendency to always focused on enhance many of construction instead of repairing the old facilities. There are some following reason which is government have to spend their money to renovate the old buildings.
Firstly, old buildings are seen as a neglected buildings in the middle of city. It is inevitable, some of the old buildings conditioncontinued to deteriorated moreover it become ruins which not able to seen in original form. Furthermore, living near the old buildings can become a hazardous place to live. To illustrate, some of the buildings have no longer to stand firmly in view of the fact that the building structure simply does not support it, therefore inhabitants who live in modern house surround it is really risky. Secondly, Apart from its unique architecture, the building also represent inheritance of the past times. Due to its historical, the old age buildings have more art values than modern buildings. Thirdly, the buildings have been stood in land thus government does not have to spent extra expenses to expand the area to build more constructions.
In contrast, in order to building new houses , government should have to harness the new lands for a new development. Although developing the road can help the inhabitants a lot , it really spend enormous amount of money to finish the development whereas the development of old building is more economical.
In conclusion, government have to conserve the old building first, after that they are able to take a good maintenence of the other development. Lastlly, with the old buildings existence, the young generation have respectful to old history.
(word count:291)
