TayElliott
Jan 21, 2011
Writing Feedback / "whenever there is problem they can help each other" -the quality of a good neighbor? [4]
No problem! (:
No problem! (:
TayElliott
Jan 19, 2011
Writing Feedback / "whenever there is problem they can help each other" -the quality of a good neighbor? [4]
When I think of neighbors, the first thing that comes up in my mind is that they are part of our daily lives because we meet them almost everyday. I believe that everyone wants to have good neighbors
so that whenever there are problems they can help each other. In my opinion, good neighbors are those who are respectful, friendly, and helpful.
First of all, in order to live in a peaceful environment respect is the most important quality of being a good neighbors .They should not disturb our privacy or space. For example, when they park their car they should not take up so much space that others don't have any space to park, because this will cause a conflict between themself . Moreover, a good neighbors always give respect by not opening aplaying loud music that would bother others as well as not throwing thingsunnecessarily that could spoil the natural beauty of the area. Therefore, respect is the major quality o f the good neighbors.
Secondly, being friendly is also an other quality of a good neighbor because there are always there for you whenever you are alone. For example, I've lived in an apartment alone for almost 7 yearsand currently I still live in apartment .On the first week I felt very lonely because it's a new place for me. However, I was lucky that I met my very nice neighbors because they never make me feel alone and right now they are like one of my closest friends. Whenever we have holidays we usally come up with doing some thing like going shopping, swimming, watching movies and etc.
Finally,I think that helpfulness is a characteristic that everyone should have. If we help each other than we should not fearabout any thing whenever there are any problems in your home area, apartment or any whereneighborhood . Take the example of mine, once I went to my friends birthday party and I came back to room around mid night.That time I was very tired and I had lost my room key. There was no one to help me except my neighbor. I called her to help me. I thought she would be angry because I woke her up at midnight, but instead she helped me and get new key. The important part was that she smiled at me and informed me that this happenes to everyone.
In conclusion , being respectful, friendly, and helpful are the qualifications that I believe good neighbors should have. I believe that you can find these qualifications once you start to be respect, helpful and friendly with others first.
so that whenever there are problems they can help each other. In my opinion, good neighbors are those who are respectful, friendly, and helpful.
First of all, in order to live in a peaceful environment respect is the most important quality of being a good neighbor
Secondly, being friendly is also an other quality of a good neighbor because there are always there for you whenever you are alone. For example, I've lived in an apartment alone for almost 7 years
Finally,I think that helpfulness is a characteristic that everyone should have. If we help each other than we should not fear
In conclusion , being respectful, friendly, and helpful are the qualifications that I believe good neighbors should have. I believe that you can find these qualifications once you start to be respect, helpful and friendly with others first.
TayElliott
Jan 19, 2011
Undergraduate / "Struggle and success: I completed the courses with all A's" -significant experience [3]
Thank you. (:
Thank you. (:
TayElliott
Jan 19, 2011
Writing Feedback / TOEFL: amusing movies or serious movies [2]
I like the points that you pointed out in the essay and it has a good overall concept.
You just have a few minor mistakes with plurals and singulars and some of the way the
words and sentences are formed. Overall, it's pretty good.
I like the points that you pointed out in the essay and it has a good overall concept.
You just have a few minor mistakes with plurals and singulars and some of the way the
words and sentences are formed. Overall, it's pretty good.
TayElliott
Jan 19, 2011
Writing Feedback / A person you know is planning to move to your town or city (Bangkok, Thailand) [6]
Well, I would say that your introduction and conclusion are too short.
Try to add more information on what the essay is about in your introduction.
Also, some words are singular and should be plural.
For example, "place" should be places in the first sentence of your second paragraph.
If you just edit a little more and re-write, it should be fine. (:
Well, I would say that your introduction and conclusion are too short.
Try to add more information on what the essay is about in your introduction.
Also, some words are singular and should be plural.
For example, "place" should be places in the first sentence of your second paragraph.
If you just edit a little more and re-write, it should be fine. (:
TayElliott
Jan 19, 2011
Undergraduate / "Struggle and success: I completed the courses with all A's" -significant experience [3]
So, I'm working on an essay for admission to a college and I'm not the greatest at writing.
Any help is greatly appreciated!
The Prompt says to pick my most significant person, experience, or circumstance that has changed my life so far. It also says to explain how it has influence my character and how I can use what I learned from it to achieve my goals.
My Essay:
Many people get sick throughout their lives, go to the doctor for medicine, and get better. Then there are the lucky few who experience a mysterious illness. No doctor can diagnose it or find any medicine to give them relief. This would be where I fall in. My sophomore year in high school is when a mysterious illness came into my life. From that day on my life will be forever changed.
I started off going to class regularly and trying my best to keep up with all my new classes. All of a sudden I began to have a very persistent stomach pain. The pain became almost unbearable. It caused me to spend a numerous amount school days in the nurse's office or at home. Attending different doctors and having multiple procedures turned out no results. Because of this, for my second semester my counselor and family decided I should try a type of home schooling. It seemed like a great idea in the beginning, but ended with me not understanding and failing classes.
I decided to go back to school for my junior year, looking for a better outcome. The cycle of missing school eventually started all over again. My grades were slipping down to failures and my health was even worse. With help from my counselor, it was finally decided that for my senior year I would go to an alternative school. This school was a way for me to work on all the classes I needed at my own pace. This decision changed my life. Because I was behind there were 9 classes that I needed. I ended up finishing all of these courses in 3 months. It was the most amazing thing to know that I had accomplished something I stressed about for two years. To make it even better, I completed the courses with all A's.
Ultimately, this long struggle that ended with success has affected me greatly. It has given me a positive attitude and patience with knowing that even through down fall good things can arise. If I try to achieve something, with hard work it is possible. This experience has allowed me to know that on my way to accomplishing my dreams in the future that as long as I continue to work hard I will get to the goal I aim for.
So, I'm working on an essay for admission to a college and I'm not the greatest at writing.
Any help is greatly appreciated!
The Prompt says to pick my most significant person, experience, or circumstance that has changed my life so far. It also says to explain how it has influence my character and how I can use what I learned from it to achieve my goals.
My Essay:
Many people get sick throughout their lives, go to the doctor for medicine, and get better. Then there are the lucky few who experience a mysterious illness. No doctor can diagnose it or find any medicine to give them relief. This would be where I fall in. My sophomore year in high school is when a mysterious illness came into my life. From that day on my life will be forever changed.
I started off going to class regularly and trying my best to keep up with all my new classes. All of a sudden I began to have a very persistent stomach pain. The pain became almost unbearable. It caused me to spend a numerous amount school days in the nurse's office or at home. Attending different doctors and having multiple procedures turned out no results. Because of this, for my second semester my counselor and family decided I should try a type of home schooling. It seemed like a great idea in the beginning, but ended with me not understanding and failing classes.
I decided to go back to school for my junior year, looking for a better outcome. The cycle of missing school eventually started all over again. My grades were slipping down to failures and my health was even worse. With help from my counselor, it was finally decided that for my senior year I would go to an alternative school. This school was a way for me to work on all the classes I needed at my own pace. This decision changed my life. Because I was behind there were 9 classes that I needed. I ended up finishing all of these courses in 3 months. It was the most amazing thing to know that I had accomplished something I stressed about for two years. To make it even better, I completed the courses with all A's.
Ultimately, this long struggle that ended with success has affected me greatly. It has given me a positive attitude and patience with knowing that even through down fall good things can arise. If I try to achieve something, with hard work it is possible. This experience has allowed me to know that on my way to accomplishing my dreams in the future that as long as I continue to work hard I will get to the goal I aim for.
