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Posts by Ankita
Joined: Mar 29, 2011
Last Post: Dec 2, 2011
Threads: 4
Posts: 28  

From: India

Displayed posts: 32
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Ankita   
Dec 2, 2011
Undergraduate / 'world-renown scholars for the biology program' - UIUC transfer [3]

and the comfortable environment trans formed me into the man, I am now of self worth and someone who appreciates the ones around me him in my his community.

I used family support, and a strong desire to succeed as motivation for my everyday life,so as
to always move forward with no complaints no matter what life throws at me.

and this desire leadshas lead to my decision to pursue an education further, in hopes of ultimately becoming a Physician Assistant.
Numerous visits to UIUC allowed me to interact with like-minded, and ambitious people like myself .
Ankita   
Dec 2, 2011
Undergraduate / "The Nation's Party" - application volunteering [3]

When I think of a person who has impacted my life the most.He has made a huge effect in my life, and has reformed my life it vividly.

Whenever there was a funeral, he would go and consultdo u mean console?? the family, even if he didn't know them. That is how I want to reflect from his life.
Ankita   
Oct 28, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

hi Rajiv..well I thought that this particular thread is for the LOR's so pasted the second one also here and as far as inviting others for their comments is concerned..everyone is welcome..and when anyone posts a message in a thread..that thread comes up in the stack and the visitors can visualize it and also jot down their opinions.

anyways if you want me to open a new thread I ll do the same (as already stated I am a docile person ;))
and thanks for your modifications. :)
Ankita   
Oct 26, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

Hi..happy Diwali.. With this note of diwali greetings I am here by pasting one more LOR for your perusal.. Hope to get signal soon.

I am extremely pleased to recommend XYZ for pursuing her Master's study. A student of my college, I have known her very well during her graduate study, and appreciate her dedication, sincerity and discipline. She has scored a First Class with distinction in Bachelor of Engineering (Electronics) and has made both her College and Department proud, topping in the "ABC" subject in the department

I fondly remember her extracurricular involvement, where she has demonstrated leadership qualities, organization skills, and team work in most co-curricular activities and events held in college in various committees and in various capacities. The enriching experience which she gained during the years of her undergraduate education have stamped astounding imprints on her academic and non-scholastic career, and have made her confident enough to carry forward this spirit in her future with full determination.

I was the chairman of anti ragging committee of the college and she was an active member of the same. During this association, I got several chances to observe her closely. She took conscientious efforts to keep a check on such menace by counseling the students and bringing the bullies to book. Further, I admire her skills in communication, oration and noteworthy helpful nature, which made her quite popular among her batchmates and juniors. She helped needy students who had difficulties in their subjects by tutoring them for free during her college days.

I have strongly advised her to pursue a masters' degree and would be honored by your University accepting XYZ for her study preferably with some financial aid, thereby providing her both the opportunity & motivation to reach greater heights. And I assure you that she deserves to be offered the esteemed scholarship
Ankita   
Oct 20, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

@ Rajiv: I am a docile person. and your valuable suggestions are always welcome, even if they appeared to me perplexing initially.. but then you nicely quoted a pragmatic example to let me understand.

Kevin had suggested me to "to add a jewel to the center of the lotus... " Well here I found a lotus (RAJIV) helping me out to place jewels" :)

I hope I ll be getting your perusal, for my other drafts (still in nascent stage ) also.
Ankita   
Oct 14, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

@ Rajiv: Thanks for your comments. but I want to say that even though I referred some LORs but this one was not only made by me but also my refree was involved. He suggested some points (that are absolutely true) , which he wanted me to elaborate. I just acted upon his advice. But as of now, I am in a dilemma as what you said was like I must make it simple not exaggerated one. last time Kevin suggested me to write an compelling anecdote,something which still remains indelible in the mind of the reader even if he/she skims the draft. I did the same,that too a true story.

Now what exactly do you want me to do? Kindly let me know.
Ankita   
Oct 10, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

Dear Susan...
Thanks a lot for replying me,however I am doubtful in some regards like:-

Is the usage of word MESS correct,as in India we call the food court as mess..like if we have the hostel (private/in campus) then usually there are also mess facilities provided. which is a place provided to dine. but I think that this word is known in some different sense..may be SHABBY!!

also I didnt understand what you want me to do in last sentence..as far as the word WELL-ENDOWDED is concerned...
Do u want me to replace it by some other suitable adjective??

and else and except these changes is there anything which need to be omitted or modified???

Do tell me!!

:)
Ankita   
Oct 4, 2011
Letters / ('she is amongst the well-endowed people') LOR from the employer [16]

Hi all and Kevin.It has been so long,since I visited Essay forum.
last time I came up with a letter of recommendation from my employer and you suggested me some modifications.
"Now, it there anything you can add to this that will make it seem like you really are exactly the right person for this scholarship? What would you be looking for if you were the reader? Would it be some mention of ...um... maybe a story! I think a compelling anecdote could show that she is an inspired professional whose potential is still unrealized because of difficult circumstances. A paragraph-long anecdote could help a lot to win the reader over...

:-)

That is why I say the first para was ineffective. It had nothing original... just ordinary letter of rec. stuff.

As of now, I still look at the first paragraph, and I want a key word added to it. I challenge you to use the word "atmosphere" in the last sentence of the first paragraph. If you do not like how it comes out, try the word "creativity."

The point is to add a jewel to the center of the lotus... to add a magic word that fills the reader's mind as she skims the first paragraph".


Now I am here again,with a modified draft,hope this one gets a green signal soon...

It is with great pleasure and enthusiasm that I am writing this letter of recommendation to endorse Ms. ABC application to your University. I hope my perspective will be helpful to you to evaluate this promising candidate.

I've known her for twenty months. ABC is an industrious employee, who executed her responsibilities in a consistent and thorough and manner. She believes in doing the tasks effectively in the first instance itself, and has a strong conviction towards hard work supported by sincere and responsible approach.

She comes from a very respectable family and possesses high moral values. Having gone through many tough times during her studies, she knows the value of capital. I was impressed by her altruistic attitude evident by her work as mess incharge of the girl's hostel. She made a well planned food budget, which was economical as far as monetary aspect was concerned ,due to which not only the college but also the hosteller girls especially those who had financially strained lifestyle got benefitted.

With the passage of time, another quality I noticed in her is accessibility. She possesses excellent inter-personal and communication skills that help her in getting along with her seniors, peers and juniors, even with unlettered workers, with equal ease. She is among the most popular employees and almost speaks to everyone with outmost ease, thus endorsing her with one of the very important traits of being a good leader. On the social front she was actively involved in various departmental and college functions like seminars, debates, presentations and social campaigns, where she proved to be a very reliable team member and an effective leader, giving her best and getting the full co-operation of others.

She is an ambitious person and has made the necessary investment of time and effort to learn more about her educational options. I am sure she will perform very well in varied situations. Her enthusiasm and diligence for learning are her plus points .She has a positive mindset and is always on a look out for new challenges to turn them into opportunities. Her systematic approach to problems makes her come out with variety of innovative solutions within the stipulated time.

I do wish to express my conviction that she is amongst the well-endowed people, whom I have come across in the past many years. I endorse her candidacy with full confidence. I am sure she would benefit from a graduate program from your prestigious university. Please don't hesitate to contact me, if you need any further information.

Hope to get your reply soon. :-)
Ankita   
Oct 4, 2011
Scholarship / Need a short essay in micro, macro economics, or econometrics for scholarship [2]

Hi there. essay forum is indeed a very advantageous platform ,but first of all,you need to jot down some points or lets say..umm..you need to create a draft and then only we will be able to modify it.

you can take help from many search engines,where there are plethora of samples scholarship Sop's given. get an idea..and then start writing an essay based on your personal instances.

hope this helps...

Ankita   
Oct 4, 2011
Writing Feedback / a serious and strict teacher is more effective than a teacher with humor? [4]

Hi there.I have made some obvious changes..Hope you find them useful

Since nowadays economy filled with depression and deflation is a battlefield to us where the goal is to seek a decent job and live on our own, strict control and management on students is required more than ever. Meanwhile, a piece of joke will spoil the tense atmosphere where the target of tremendous efficiency is almost reached, which is the second point I want to discuss.

Tight and tense environment created by rigid teachers creates the efficiency.
To illustrate this further , I rememberhow the successful teacher's class in high school looked like; as he was giving his lecture on schedule and performing in a strict manner, all the students raised their heads, put down their cell phones and tried their best to soak the knowledge. Students who used to get distracted by irrelevant events were asked questions to continue focusing on their class. The great exam scores of that class were totally predictable.
Ankita   
Jul 30, 2011
Graduate / Motivation letter for getting a place in good university,for persuing master's degree [8]

@ Moe Tee: Kevin was a or rather I can say is a support and it was under his guidance that I was able to create some nice SOP's and LORs.

These helped me in getting selected for some good universities but my current financial condition isn't that good, and my parents cant afford such hefty amount. Due to this reason I was inquiring about some scholarship/studentship schemes.

If at all you or anyone else has some idea regarding the same, please help me out.
Ankita   
Jul 27, 2011
Graduate / Motivation letter for getting a place in good university,for persuing master's degree [8]

@ Kevin: I was able to get offers from many good universities. but irrespective of being so close,now I got pushed back by the circumstances. My current financial condition isn't that healthy, that I can afford my studies abroad,without financial assistance. If you could,tell me about some more scholarships,which British Council or any other external funding body offers..it will of great help!!
Ankita   
Jul 27, 2011
Essays / "To what extent and in what ways do you believe India can alleviate 'Brain Drain'? [16]

Hello friends. It is good that this thread started by me,has become actually a discussion club..where even I got some more information about BC scholarship. However I am doubtful in one regard, whether the shortlisted candidates will be given a topic on spot and they will have to present it or else it will be given beforehand,I mean 10-20 min before..

Also what exactly do they mean by presentation? I mean do we need to prepare a power point presentation or speak on it for 10 min or else pen down our opinions..

Also If any one of you could,tell me about some more scholarships,which British Council or any other external funding body offers..it will of great help!!

Hope you guys will help me to resolve all these queries. :)
Ankita   
Jun 30, 2011
Essays / "To what extent and in what ways do you believe India can alleviate 'Brain Drain'? [16]

Hi all.. thank you for your replies.

@ Kevin: you've been such a support, every time.

@Mr. Ajit Rai: your invaluable suggested are indeed of great help.
but following instructions were given to write this essay.
1. Answer all parts
2. Demonstrate originality
3. Present thought provoking point of view
4. English language proficiency to a level, where undue strain isn't placed on the reader
also the limit of the words is 300 only and when I drafted the essay, the word limit got extended and I was not able to cover all the points which u had instructed.

Anyways i have tried my level best to write it, and pasting it for the perusal.

The exodus from the homeland due to the bureaucracy, red tapeism and many other reasons isn't a mere migration of a certain sect of the skilled or unskilled people but this brain drain costs the developing nations a lot.

It no doubt gives the individual a good exposure, when he/she leaves home and property behind to gamble for life in a place full of opportunities to gain highest echelons. But this virtual metempsychosis of natives, who leave their ancestral abodes, in quest of better future has become an alerting problem especially in the poor countries, which are yet to stabilize themselves.

In India there are ample reasons behind brain drain like lack of proper education system, unavailability of proper infrastructure and other prevalent hindrances.

With the mushrooming of the colleges in India, a very large population of engineering graduates is passing out every year. These new entrants get the salary, which doesn't justify their qualification. The government needs to provide enough avenues for the fresh graduates, help them join the mainstream and contribute towards the development of the country.

Government needs to avoid taking the narrow road and make a hassle-free environment over a broader demography by abolishing the outdated obstacles.

The government can further relieve the aspiring professional students by introducing tax-cuts and exemptions. That way, as far as the expenditures incurred are concerned, a student undergoing graduation from an Indian institute should be brought at par with the one pursuing his studies in the USA where one is liable for an interest rate of 5-8% p.a., unlike in India where the rates are as high as 11-13.5% p.a.

Due to this brain-drain, India loses $2 billion a year. Government needs to lay down a well-thought roadmap and work bullishly to bring about a radical change in this matter.


hope you all will do the corrections (if needed)
Ankita   
May 26, 2011
Graduate / Motivation letter for getting a place in good university,for persuing master's degree [8]

I was able to secure a position in some universities,but still there are some other universities..where I want to apply and so I am pasting my SOP for review.

My statement of purpose is going to highlight my interests and motivation behind achieving my career objectives and pursuing graduate program at University of XYZ.

I am interested to apply for a Master's Degree Program in ABC starting in 2011. I graduated in 2008, from the University of 123, India and hold a Bachelors degree in ----Engineering

The four year undergraduate program in Electronics engineering formed the basis of my perseverance towards achieving an in-depth knowledge in the field of --. As a part of my degree course I studied various subjects relating to diverse aspects of Electronics which includes ----.

In my second year of bachelor's degree, I underwent the experience of developing a --. Under the guidance of Prof. ---, I along with my friend prepared the circuit that was able to display desirable features and given parameters. While submitting the assignment, our lecturer observed us with a grin while watching the circuit mounted on a big Printed Circuit Board (PCB). His remarks - "You made a good model, but it is big in size. This is an era of nanotechnology. The miniaturized circuits have replaced the antiquated and gigantic circuits" - left an indelible impression about this futuristic field in my mind.

I happened to have a real rendezvous with -- during final year of my under graduation, while I had gone to participate in a national level paper presentation competition. A paper presented on this topic in the function struck an instant chord with me. In the same semester, I was fortunate enough to be a part of a many more paper presentations at college level, where many papers emphasized on ---. I began to realize that this domain had indeed a lot of practical applications that an electronics engineer would feel proud to use in day-to-day life.

The wide applications of this capricious field introduced me to plethora of opportunities for discovering the inner wells of knowledge that this had to offer and which, consequently, led me to decide on furthering my studies.

I want to carry forward my penchant for ---, as this technology is gaining increasing importance, in all aspects and is having significant impact on almost all industries and all areas of society. There is an ample scope to prove one's ability, competence and intelligence in this revolutionary and potentially very beneficial technology.

My insatiable hunger for exploring new avenues in the field of engineering and the unrelenting efforts towards discovering the hitherto unknown facets of electronics encouraged me to venture into research and development exercises. In my final year, I undertook a project entitled --" in "---Limited". Previously, the testing methodologies that had been conducted manually were time- consuming and involved perilous risks. Our objective was to improve the speedy aspects of manufacturing and delivery of starters, which was successfully accomplished.

This project has given me a great exposure in the field of automation. These experiences were invaluable for me since I learned the serviceability and functionality of various real world applications. Unlike the milieu of the college, the corporate environment was very much different. The concept of learning, accountability for the work at hand gave me a greater focus. The most challenging aspect however was the rate of the learning, which was immense.

In the final year of my engineering studies I was introduced to the subject of --. The first session in the labs was devoted to developing simple programs in -- software using different modeling techniques. A combination of different gates used to build various blocks generating complete control circuits for various computations fascinated me. I got to interact with Prof. ---, a professor of great repute in the field of VLSI design. He introduced me to the synergies of very large scale integration techniques. Under his guidance I was able to top in this subject in the college.

Besides the college academics I was actively involved in the extra-curricular activities. The driving force behind all this was my aim to develop all the facets of my personality. In this process I could not achieve the grades I wanted to, in the first and second year. But soon I garnered the skill of judicious allocation of time and energy. I did well in the third year and final year of Engineering. Moreover I do not feel that the marks I scored are the sole indicators of my understanding of the subject. A cogent reason to augment my belief is the final year of my engineering, where with strong focus and hard work, I excelled in my graduation with distinction. Considering my excellent record, my college offered me for a job as a lecturer.

Also for the past twenty months I have been working as a --- in --- department of ----. My work has helped me develop a thorough insight into return to the academic world for further growth. It has given me the confidence to pursue a Master's degree and also kindled a desire to do research.This career with open prospects has given me constant incentive to improve myself and to gain more knowledge.

Today as a __-year-old individual I perceive that life for me has been a process of conscious evolution. An integral part of this growth has been the value system imbibed in me by my parents, teachers and mentors and an immense liking for science. As I embark upon a new stage of my life, I believe that a postgraduate study will provide a milestone in my career along with invaluable experiences that will allow me to become a successful, innovative professional and assist in accomplishing my goals. Ten years from now, I envisage myself as a full-fledged research professional in an organization, or a faculty member at some leading university.

My decision to pursue graduate studies in the United Kingdom is underscored by my desire to be a part of the graduate program at your institution. The pioneering works going on at the ----department labs, which include the development of ---, perfectly match with the field of my interest. The interdisciplinary nature of --- has convinced me in taking this decision as it is the ideal choice for an exciting research career. At the same time, I am confident of contributing originally to the ongoing work at your department. By working under the guidance of distinguished faculty, I shall certainly be able to exploit my potential to the fullest.

The department web site revealed very strong faculty like Prof. ---- involved in extensive research in the area of --- engineering. This has strengthened my resolve to study at University of ---. I am confident that the erudite faculty will make my learning experience extraordinary. If I get the opportunity to be a part of that intellectually stimulating environment, I am sure my talents will be put to optimal use.

I am confident that overall opportunity to study in Europe will broaden my horizons and give me an opportunity to gain world class education and help me become an excellent world citizen.

I would therefore, feel obliged to be able to secure admission in your prestigious university with full financial assistance and pursue my M.S. program. I am sure that I will match all the credentials and will be able to maintain high standards at your university.
Ankita   
May 8, 2011
Writing Feedback / "You have done it son", i was proud of myself! [10]

okie...
well I prepared something..just chk it out..

I always stood first in class in my early years of education and won prizes in academics and extra-curricular activities like quiz, debate etc. I was class monitor and school captain. I got distinction in 10th Class and first class in 12th standard .I was positioned amongst top 200 in the country in the entrance examination for Engineering, which was taken by 1, 50,000 students.

Furthermore, I enrolled myself in for the Bachelors degree program in Electronics engineering and with strong focus and hard work, I excelled in my graduation with distinction. Considering my excellent record, my college offered me for a job as a lecturer.

Besides studies I have been actively involved in voluntary activities like NSS (National Service scheme). The camp, which aims at welfare of the society helds various activities like cleaning, afforestation, inviting doctors for health camps, creating awareness on social problems, education and cleanliness.

Also I was part of the team, which adopted an orphanage named 'Snehalya'
This team used to regularly interact with the kids and their tutors.
Organize cultural programs and organized money collection drives for them."

Ankita   
May 8, 2011
Writing Feedback / "You have done it son", i was proud of myself! [10]

Whom should I address..Meeshal or Hassan Ali Khan??
Anyways Whatever I found wrong..I made corrections. rest is fine. I could connect with the story.
the last line "If my dad was proud of me, I was proud of myself!" can be bettered..
Just think on this.

Also in the mean time can u help me out in preparing one essay,which is regarding the Academic distinctions and prizes..the word limit for the same is 300.

I know it is data centric but I am pretty confused,as how to start it..and how to conclude it..
plz do it urgent,as the deadline is 10th May..
Ankita   
May 8, 2011
Scholarship / "the defining moment in my education" -gaining scholarship for meritorious candidates [14]

Sorry..couldn't get back to my essay,as was neck pecked in mundane chores..anyways.. ll try to write some more realistic stuff and post it here. in the mean time can u help me out in preparing one more essay,which is regarding the Academic distinctions and prizes..the word limit for the same is 300.

I am pretty confused,as how to start it..and how to conclude it..
plz do it urgent,as the deadline is 10th May..
Ankita   
May 7, 2011
Writing Feedback / "You have done it son", i was proud of myself! [10]

Out of 200 students it was me who was selected.My name was called out by my principle (Principal ) I could see many jealous faces amongst the students. Even the teachers were surprised, because I never featured in the list of best orators.

I had started my preparations the same day.
With sheer confidence I walked off the stage and was congratulated by the honorable speaker and other ministers present. I felt extremely ecstatic to see my parents and my principle principal overjoyed after my speech.

hope you ll find it helpful.
Ankita   
Apr 9, 2011
Scholarship / "the defining moment in my education" -gaining scholarship for meritorious candidates [14]

thanks..for guiding me.. ll come up with a draft soon & show u..
actually i received one LOR from my employer n I am pasting it here for your perusal.plz tell me whether it is okey or some modifications are required. Hoping to get a quick reply from your end.


Letter of Recommendation

It is with great pleasure and enthusiasm that I am writing this letter of recommendation to endorse Ms. XYZ's application to your University. I hope my perspective will be helpful to you to evaluate this promising candidate.

I have known her for the past one and half years. As per my opinion, XYZ is industrious employee, who executed her responsibilities in a consistently...

SEE BELOW

Sincerely:
ABC
Ankita   
Apr 6, 2011
Scholarship / "the defining moment in my education" -gaining scholarship for meritorious candidates [14]

Hello there. I am thankful to you that u helped me in correcting my mistakes. Actually I am resident of India and want to pursue my higher studies abroad. I am applying for a scholarship and there I need to demonstrate that my work will help in achieving the development objectives of my home country.

Task: Candidates are asked to provide a statement explaining how the proposed study will benefit their home country, and how the skills and qualifications obtained will be applied on their return. References to any existing national shortages or needs would be particularly welcome. (500 words maximum).

can u please give me an idea as how to start and how to conclude the SOp.. my deadline is approaching near,so please do it on priority basis.
Ankita   
Apr 5, 2011
Scholarship / Migration to the US from India; English and Math [11]

Hello there. I read your Sop and must say that your way of expressing through words is stupendous. Would you mind helping me to prepare a Sop. Actually I am resident of India and want to pursue my higher studies abroad. I am applying for a scholarship and there I need to demonstrate that my work will help achieve the development objectives of my home country.

Task: Candidates are asked to provide a statement explaining how the proposed study will benefit their home country, and how the skills and qualifications obtained will be applied on their return. References to any existing national shortages or needs would be particularly welcome. (500 words maximum).
Ankita   
Mar 29, 2011
Scholarship / "the defining moment in my education" -gaining scholarship for meritorious candidates [14]

Task : Please comment below (not exceeding 300 words) explaining why you think that you are a particularly suitable candidate for a scholarship and why you wish to pursue your studies at the University of ABC. Please also indicate which other funding bodies you have applied to for

My statement of purpose is going to highlight my interests and motivation behind achieving my career objectives and pursuing graduate program at University of ABC.

The four year undergraduate program in Electronics engineering formed the basis of my perseverance towards achieving an in-depth knowledge in this field.
My decision to pursue graduate study in the United Kingdom is underscored by my desire to be a part of the graduate program at your institution. University of ABC offers the flexibility needed for such a vast and rapidly changing field. The department web site revealed a very strong faculty involved in extensive research in the area of Electronics engineering. This has strengthened my resolve to study at University of ABC. I am confident that the erudite faculty will make...

I always stood first in class in my early years of education and won prizes in academics and extra-curricular activities like quiz, debate etc. I was class monitor and school captain. I got distinction in 10th Class and first class in 12th standard .I was positioned amongst top 200 in the country in the entrance examination for Engineering, which was taken by 1, 50,000 students.

Furthermore, I enrolled myself in for the Bachelors degree program in Electronics engineering and with strong focus and hard work, I excelled in my graduation with distinction. Considering my excellent record, my college offered me for a job as a lecturer.

Besides studies I have been actively involved in voluntary activities like NSS (National Service scheme). The camp, which aims at welfare of the society helds various activities like cleaning, afforestation, inviting doctors for health camps, creating awareness on social problems, education and cleanliness.

Also I was part of the team, which adopted an orphanage named 'Snehalya'

This team used to regularly interact with the kids and their tutors.
Organize cultural programs and organized money collection drives for them."
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