moczy
Apr 30, 2011
Writing Feedback / 'cannot apply to all occupations' - IELTS: Not forced to retire at a particular age? [4]
Thank you so much, Dumi and EF_Kevin.
I'll keep practicing.
Thank you so much, Dumi and EF_Kevin.
I'll keep practicing.
moczy
Apr 28, 2011
Writing Feedback / 'cannot apply to all occupations' - IELTS: Not forced to retire at a particular age? [4]
This is my first time here. Please recommend my work on IELTS essay
People should be allowed to continue to work for as long as they want to, and not be forced to retire at a particular age such as 60 or 65. Do you agree or disagree?
Considering whether the age should be set up as a criterion for people to retire at 60 or 65 years old, I believe people should be able to choose whenever they want to stop working life. However, it depends on personal situation and occupation.
We cannot argue that people in elderly age group have gained an invaluable experience and knowledge in their profession. These expertise can be benefit to their team, work and organization. Doctor, for instance, take many years to develop their expertise to be able to diagnose their patients' symptoms precisely. As a consequence, most of the time we find that doctors who are in senior level can cure or help their patients quicker than those who are new graduates or junior doctors. Thus, elderly in some career should be able to use their expertise and feel being valued.
In deed, people aged over 60 could feel worthless if they have to stay out of work. In case of some people, for example, who are dedicate and have been working hard for the whole of their life, before reaching the age of 60, many evidences show that these people face with emotional problem after retirement such as anxiety.
Nonetheless, though the elderly people have a lot more experience than the young people have, not every occupation could have the elderly for work. Clearly, it is true that expertise and skills are important to achieve the best outcome, but some careers require new generations who have more energetic, are stronger and faster or be able to use new technology. Some examples of these type of work are personal trainers, waiters or waitress and engineers.
In short, there may be some reasons why people aged over 60 should be allowed to keep their working life even though it cannot be applied to all occupations. Over all, I strongly agree that age should not be set for retirement.
This is my first time here. Please recommend my work on IELTS essay
People should be allowed to continue to work for as long as they want to, and not be forced to retire at a particular age such as 60 or 65. Do you agree or disagree?
Considering whether the age should be set up as a criterion for people to retire at 60 or 65 years old, I believe people should be able to choose whenever they want to stop working life. However, it depends on personal situation and occupation.
We cannot argue that people in elderly age group have gained an invaluable experience and knowledge in their profession. These expertise can be benefit to their team, work and organization. Doctor, for instance, take many years to develop their expertise to be able to diagnose their patients' symptoms precisely. As a consequence, most of the time we find that doctors who are in senior level can cure or help their patients quicker than those who are new graduates or junior doctors. Thus, elderly in some career should be able to use their expertise and feel being valued.
In deed, people aged over 60 could feel worthless if they have to stay out of work. In case of some people, for example, who are dedicate and have been working hard for the whole of their life, before reaching the age of 60, many evidences show that these people face with emotional problem after retirement such as anxiety.
Nonetheless, though the elderly people have a lot more experience than the young people have, not every occupation could have the elderly for work. Clearly, it is true that expertise and skills are important to achieve the best outcome, but some careers require new generations who have more energetic, are stronger and faster or be able to use new technology. Some examples of these type of work are personal trainers, waiters or waitress and engineers.
In short, there may be some reasons why people aged over 60 should be allowed to keep their working life even though it cannot be applied to all occupations. Over all, I strongly agree that age should not be set for retirement.
