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Posts by jonnnnnnn
Joined: Oct 1, 2011
Last Post: Oct 1, 2011
Threads: 2
Posts: 3  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 5
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jonnnnnnn   
Oct 1, 2011
Writing Feedback / Practice AP Prompt- Identify Tragic Hero, their effects on others, and Tragic Vision [NEW]

"Select a novel or play in which a tragic figure functions as an instrument of the suffering of others. Then write an essay in which you explain how the suffering brought upon others by that figure contributes to the tragic vision of the work as a whole."

The idea that through tragedy there is progress has remained a constant literary theme since the earliest works of fiction. Catharsis, the release of tension, being one of the powerful tools or rhetoric has proved the ability to convey thoughts that would otherwise be lost in translation. An instance of this strange method is observable in Arthur Miller's Death of a Salesman. Willy Lowman, the protagonist, slowly slips into a state of nostalgic bliss, causing his family deep distress, The play uses Willy's tragedy to contribute to Arthur Miller's vision of American society.

The play follows the life and career if a traveling salesman in the late 1930's through Willy's day dreams and flashbacks. Throughout the play the audience discovers through conversations amongst Willy's family in his absence that Willy is going insane. Arthur Miller satirically implies that Willy is the average american with old-fashioned values in and shifting American society. Willy often states how unique both he and his family are, however, the audience soon learns that this sense of success is an illusion, The pain cause by Willy's constant reminiscing of fabricated memories drives Biff, Willy's son, to furiously lash out. Biff's torment adds to the underlying feeling of inadequacy felt by the younger American generation in the wake of two world wars.

Willy Lowman's character seeks reassurance and worth in fantasies of riches in foreign lands. His slacking job performance is revealed through meetings with his young successful boss that threatens to fire him unless he can make the profit that he used to. Willy, clinging to his delusion for comfort, asks his supposedly successful son, Happy, how his job is going. The truth that Happy is not prosperous is divulged through his conversation with Biff about their mutual feeling of inadequacy. The contrast between the old-fashioned American's unrealistic perspective and the younger generation's inability to live up to the old standards reaches a climax when Biff and Happy finally shatter their father's ignorance using the truth about their circumstances as the tool. Only after Willy has gone insane and caused his own death does equilibrium bring peace the to the family. The old must die to make room for the new.

Death of a Salesman provides ideal examples of misery being medicine for joy. Characters serving as tragic heros twist human nature's perception of possible paths to happiness. The very juxtaposition of prosperity and gloom define what is logical to consider tragic or successful. With out both elements, no line would exist ti determine the reasoning for either. Despite this, the path to happiness has no single route, therefore providing a role for the tragic hero.

I would like general feedback. Good and bad would be nice.
jonnnnnnn   
Oct 1, 2011
Graduate / 'my mother and I had moved' - Boston University Supplement on the Common App [3]

This is already very strong and has most of the elements it need to stand out. To begin with, it is a great idea to showcase your previous experience with topics related to the major your want, however, it is not a good idea to make it seem that you are an expert in the subject. The colleges need to to see that you want and need them. They have to believe that you consider them the only way to achieve this lofty goal of yours. You concluding message is fantastic. Be sure not to brag when throwing in community service projects, it may help to give someone else credit. This way the college takes note of both your volunteer experience and your humility.
jonnnnnnn   
Oct 1, 2011
Undergraduate / 'Boom! Boom! The most out of education' - quest bridge essay [3]

You have some really great lines in your essay and you should capitalize on those. Notably, your opening is creative and comical. It may be beneficial to run this through spell check and look at combining some of your sentences in order to vary in structure. I think that it is very unique that you highlight your failure instead of focusing on your success, most people wouldn't. The part about your sister seems random and pulls focus away from your personal hardship. Try writing more about the experience of failure or success rather than only the facts of what happened. Give the reader the chance to know you through this memory.
jonnnnnnn   
Oct 1, 2011
Undergraduate / "Life has been without affluence, but not without wealth" - Personal information [2]

If you are fearful of living as you were made than my life is not for you. If you dream of living off of the kindness of others, still faithful in the heart of man, than my life may be for you. People, like the most precious stones, bring beauty and worth to the world. They are more than numbers or stepping stones to where you wish to be. My life has been without affluence, but not without wealth. Where it has lacked in elegance it has doubled in extravagance. Through others I have become something better. The words of Thoreau echo through my past as if narrating my memories. "Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul". What I have done is worth more than what I could do.

My father married my mother and loved her to his fullest extent. He taught me to consider this love irreplaceable, and to therefore value it beyond tangible possessions. Being a man of the lord, he repented after cheating on my mother. The value of his love had not decreased, but contrarily multiplied in my mind. Not for flesh or money had he repented. He recognized his irreverence and sought to glorify the significance of love through acknowledgement and repentance. How often does one repent after telling a simple lie? The recognition that he had trespassed expressed the very respect one should have for love. This instilled in me a sense of complacency in regard to my family's economic situation.

Never finishing college, my father was handicapped compared to the competitors he faced in his industry. Money, I was taught, is never to be considered a problem, but rather a necessary evil. This deeply confused me going through middle school, silently observing my peers as they explained to the class their exquisite holidays. One day, however, our earnest teacher assigned a paper in which we were to detail the best part of life in our own words. I had no previous luxuries to reference, no indulgences to allude to. I suddenly remembered the first time my baby nephew slept in my arms. I recalled how his heart, pressed against mine, felt like the ticking of a clock, counting down to his first steps, his first day of school, his first kiss, his wedding, and eventually his death. The infant curled in a deep slumber had no sense of sin, only love. I wrote about love: The best part of life.

I would like to know which points are worth keeping, if there is a certain direction this should go, and if it is too broad and off topic. Thanks!
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