Graduate / 'evolution of humans and animals' - admission essay for MFA, SFAI SFAC CCA [NEW]

Hello,
this is the first time I am seriously applying for my MFA in painting. One school asked to cover three major objectives in a 500-1000 word essay. These objectives are:

What is my work about, Why CCA (or whatever school), and what can I contribute to the community, I paraphrase these quastions essentially, but you inderstand the basics.

My questions are, Do I answer these questions effectively, Is it coherent, is is unique and interesting, is it well written? Do you see any grammar that is incorrect or hard to understand?

Thank you for your feed back, if you want to see some art work of mine, see fanciemammal.blogspot.com, newer art is on the right of the blog, as well as older ones to the bottom right.

My work has always been about two things, evolution of humans and animals and their direct relation to each other in regards to their actions, emotions which I see as parallel behaviors. This correlates in regards to my internal struggle of how to make sense of the outside world and how I should relate to and understand it. Through my work I am constantly trying to illustrate the link between the human animal and the wild or even domesticated animal, and how our behaviors reflect each others. As I see it this is a natural occurrence through evolution, something we share in common at the core of everyone, and everything. Through this exploration I hope to expose the reasons to respect each other, and our animal counterparts, and through that, the earth which sustains us all. I hope to expose the reasons we should not condone such things as dog fighting, or dry up wetlands that migrating birds use as fuel to keep going through their long journey, to help prevent the furthering of global warming, and to encourage mankind to see themselves as the wild animal that they are, and see the common thread that ties us all together as we all evolve, human and animal.

Artistically I desire to grow both technically and conceptually. I want to discover through networking and participating in a community such as a school like CCA, a way to find new avenues to get my message out about evolution and our link to the natural world, a way to help the masses appreciate the world that created us. I have a growing compulsion to make a difference in people's lives through education, and helping people get reacquainted with natural beauty, and realizing we have much to learn from nature, we must only pay attention. I imagine teaching children about nature through painting murals, showing inner city kids that there is a natural history story ready to be told at every corner.

I wish to collaborate with other people who have common interests but express it through other avenues, therefore exposing me to new techniques and ways to express my interests progressively. My experience of muraling around San Francisco is an attribute that could help other students seeking to reach out to the community as well allowing me to work collaboratively with others and the community. CCA is a progressive school that seems to link proactive behaviors with the artistic practice, this interests me because I have gone along this muraling and curating path mostly alone, trying to reach out to community and build a stronger one of my own. But sometimes joining a new community is the way to forge new ones and enrich the existing ones, I see CCA as the epicenter for this kind of thinking.

I am seeking a master's degree in painting because I want to do what I love, painting, while exploring new ways to reach out to and create community. I want to expose people to the compassion that I have for our brothers the animals and the natural world that sustains us. A masters degree will further my career as an artist and open new avenues for me, such as teaching, I want to make an impact in people's lives young and old. I no longer want to work retail while I paint at night in my studio when I could be giving all my time to the things that drive me and have always inspired me. As a child I had chickens and ducks, roosters and many cats running around my yard, at the same time I lived only a mile outside of down town phoenix, I could see the tall buildings from my house. I would mimic the sounds that the animals made, sometimes evoking a response out of them, but not knowing what I had said in their language. I followed them around like one of the hens, held their chicks in my hands imagining I was keeping them warm, I have been reaching out to communities creatively since I was small, and as an adult I seek to do the same, create a community and expose our similarities through what seems to be our inherent differences.