sami talib
Nov 26, 2011
Writing Feedback / IELTS --- Should we follow fashion trends or not? [3]
the increasingly amounts of clothing advertisement....the increase in number of colthing advertisement or... a lot of advertisements for clothing
fashion trends is going to be an essential...fashion trends are going to be
simply follow it ...simply follow the fashion or trend
deciding to follow any popular trends ....trend
In other words, it is people themselves instead of designers...there are people themselves or they are the people
one ignores this important truth .... ignores this aspect
Further....moreover or furthermore is more appropriate word
theatre ....theater
They only need to prepare several popular clothing for particular ...it doesn't seem to be appropriate...they only need to wear trendy clothes or....they can follow the fashion on some occasions
you mentioned megastars( celebrities would be fine) in conclusion....first you should mention some points about celebrities in opinion paragraph
overall you have used relevant examples.
the increasingly amounts of clothing advertisement....the increase in number of colthing advertisement or... a lot of advertisements for clothing
fashion trends is going to be an essential...fashion trends are going to be
simply follow it ...simply follow the fashion or trend
deciding to follow any popular trends ....trend
In other words, it is people themselves instead of designers...there are people themselves or they are the people
one ignores this important truth .... ignores this aspect
Further....moreover or furthermore is more appropriate word
theatre ....theater
They only need to prepare several popular clothing for particular ...it doesn't seem to be appropriate...they only need to wear trendy clothes or....they can follow the fashion on some occasions
you mentioned megastars( celebrities would be fine) in conclusion....first you should mention some points about celebrities in opinion paragraph
overall you have used relevant examples.