impressionist
Nov 27, 2011
Undergraduate / 'I have handled almost everything' - UC Prompt 2 [3]
I personally think that this personal statement needs to be more cohesive as a whole. And your opening sentence is not the strongest way to start your statement.
The sentence, "As you know, AP Tests are taken for 2 weeks in May," is a bit awkward to be... also the rhetorical questions don't work for me either.
Maybe you can improve your essay by shortening the first five sentences about the SATs and AP tests because it just seems unnecessary to list everything. and emphasize on how you have managed to deal with everything
I personally think that this personal statement needs to be more cohesive as a whole. And your opening sentence is not the strongest way to start your statement.
The sentence, "As you know, AP Tests are taken for 2 weeks in May," is a bit awkward to be... also the rhetorical questions don't work for me either.
Maybe you can improve your essay by shortening the first five sentences about the SATs and AP tests because it just seems unnecessary to list everything. and emphasize on how you have managed to deal with everything