ComaPrison11
Dec 30, 2011
Undergraduate / 'I hope to major in Biology' - UPenn [12]
First two paragraphs seemed pretty good. Just like what Pottergirl19 said, in order to address the prompt a little more and to prove that Penn is the perfect fit for you, you should talk more about what you can do for the Penn Community(in the last 2 paragraphs especially).
For example,
What can YOU do about the school spirit and pride at Penn / what does school spirit mean to you?
First two paragraphs seemed pretty good. Just like what Pottergirl19 said, in order to address the prompt a little more and to prove that Penn is the perfect fit for you, you should talk more about what you can do for the Penn Community(in the last 2 paragraphs especially).
For example,
Penn seem to exude amazing school spirit and pride.
What can YOU do about the school spirit and pride at Penn / what does school spirit mean to you?
