Unanswered [12] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by INB
Joined: Jan 1, 2012
Last Post: Jan 7, 2012
Threads: 1
Posts: 4  

From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 5
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INB   
Jan 7, 2012
Undergraduate / 'constantly on the move' - Why do you feel Seattle University [6]

Hi Angelina,

This is a good and precise essay. I would recommend you to elaborate on your background...why you were on the move constantly, numbers(grades) were unchanging throughout ..love working with numbers and have come to appreciate the diversity in this world.

Rephrasing - "While growing up, I was constantly on the move, whether it was to a new school, new neighbourhood or even to a different country with changes in languages and culture being inevitable. (A line about why you constantly travelled - is it beacuse of the nature of your Dad's work?)

However, grades were unchanging throughout.

Talk about how you made friends from different ethinicities...how you were raised by your parents to be a devout christian and how much you appreciate it...one of the reasons you particularly like Seattle's university with strong Jesuits tradition...

Also make a connection of where and when did you fall in love with finance and economics and decided to pursue it.
INB   
Jan 7, 2012
Undergraduate / 'being Vietnamese' - University of Wisconsin: How will you enrich our community? [3]

Hi Natalia,

You make a good start, but somehow in the course, loose track of what you are saying. The college application is looking for instances and experiences from your past that they can relate to you if you are accepted at the coolege. It is the way you share your anecdotes that will speak of who you are as a person and what values you embody. You should talk more about how being a Vietnamese you faced challenges while growing up...how different you felt yourself to be from the rest of the children and still made an effort to blend in completely...how you never let your grades slip beacuse of this and how committed you were...talk about your interactions with the American friends and how you have come in being accepted in your friend circle ...even a long way in appreciating your background and looking at things from a different angle. This would highlight how you accept diversity and how you can contribute to the community learning from past instances.

All the best for your application! May you do well :)
INB   
Jan 7, 2012
Graduate / SOP - Admission to Communications Program [3]

Hi kevin,

Thanks for your inputs. Now that I read the essay once again with all the new inputs, it does read much better. Just a question here - I had unknowingly submiited my essay in the undergraduate category, hope this does nothing to the content as such because of this? Am I supposed to redo the thing for the graduate level essay?

PS: Thank You for the compliment and encouragement!
INB   
Jan 3, 2012
Scholarship / "I can do" mindset - I deserve this scholarship ! [Scholaships for Japan intl uni] [5]

Hi Cindy,

This is a good first draft and needs vetting. Apart from the grammatical mistakes, the essay needs to be more precise and specific. It would be good to talk about the desired course you plan to take up and how it would help you in future, why you are interested in this particular course/university. Also, while explaining your plans you should express your ideas like when you mention that, "Once I set a goal, I do my best to achieve it. I love challenges. I never do something halfway; I manage to do it until the finish line" it would do you good if you share an example from your past experiences of how you have demonstrated these qualities.
INB   
Jan 1, 2012
Graduate / SOP - Admission to Communications Program [3]

As a five year old, eating food while listening to the advertisement jingles on television and sleeping on the couch, I was often glued to the television as most children of my age are. But, what differentiated me from the rest of the children was my flair to mix-match four-five jingles together to make it a parody and entertain my little cousins and friends. I would insist my parents bring home the very same products that had the best jingle. I was the perfect target audience for brand managers.

As I grew a little older, I was in awe of my maternal uncle who was the marketing head of his company looking after the South Asian continent. I used to visualize him in a big office, sitting behind his mahogany desk, signing important papers and planning crucial marketing strategies for the business. Knowing of my curiosity, my uncle often used to indulge me and share his experiences of travelling to different geographies for business that added fodder to my little imagination. I always knew that I was going to be a Marketing Head when I grew up; signing those important papers I had always envisaged my uncle sign. The fact that I didn't know the role of a Marketing Head at that age did not deter me and firmed me in my belief nevertheless.

Never losing sight of my dream, I became a serious and committed student during my high school trying to figure out my path to achieve my dream. At that age, I was fascinated with learning new facts. I particularly had a good aptitude in business studies, and economics. My math tutor having been my mentor for four years knew me particularly well in and out of class and advised that I should be thinking of making a career in communications since I had a gift for it. I enrolled for the conventional bachelor of commerce program during college, as educational institutions in India do not provide flexibility of majoring/minoring in one field.

Post my graduation, I took up a summer job with a leading business process outsourcing company for telemarketing to earn a few bucks as pocket money. This experience fueled my passion and served to increase my interest in marketing activities of businesses and at the same time polishing my communication and leadership skills.

I was thoroughly convinced that I needed to do my Masters to provide me with a sound foundation and the required expertise. My Masters in International Marketing equipped me with strong analytical skills as it involved various facets of international marketing strategy, marketing research, business economics, international business environment and finance. Armed with the requisite skills and experience I was ready to enter the world of Marketing. I joined Burson Marsteller (India), Public Relations Company as a trainee and joined the Associate Learning Programme, a year-long structured programme focused on learning at the very foundation within the working environment.

I was in the client servicing team and my specialization was in Technology practice, responsible for client's communication management: planning and execution of strategically focused public relations campaign, content creation and coordination for initiated activities. I worked there for four years wherein I grew as a professional- From a Trainee to a Junior associate, then on to a Senior associate and finally to a Consulting Associate by the time I was leaving.

Having worked closely with the Marketing teams of the client and designing and implementing their communication strategy acted as a catalyst in building my excitement towards marketing and communication. With the advent of non-conventional media like the internet and social media marketing, I became all the more keen on pursuing further graduate studies for a specialization into Communications.

I am a staunch believer that there is no age for learning and a person keeps learning till her/his very end.

I am aware of my skills and strengths, my capability of developing new skills by learning, and, my limitations. The knowledge and experience I possess would be pertinent to the study of communication, coupled with my hunger and passion for learning and willingness to take up any challenge.

I am positive that this program will advance me with the knowledge, personal skills and competence with an international experience essential to understand the dynamic nature of the global business marketing environment. From my work experience, I have realized how important it is to be a specialist and the Public Relations/Advertising program will put me on the fast tract to be a specialist in marketing communication which is my career ambition. The international environment at University of Detroit will contribute to my professional growth.
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