Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
wow O.O Hey thanks! That was a huge confidence boost ^.^
wow O.O Hey thanks! That was a huge confidence boost ^.^
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Katniss Everdeen was plunged' - Claremont McKenna [4]
"...no one she trusted had survived in order to help her make decisions as leader of the rebellion."
Well, it sounds very good. But perhaps you could add more of a conclusion.
c...could...you...maybe...h...help me? o:
"...no one she trusted had survived in order to help her make decisions as leader of the rebellion."
Well, it sounds very good. But perhaps you could add more of a conclusion.
c...could...you...maybe...h...help me? o:
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
Newly revised commonapp essay choice 4 Due tonight!
Okay, so I submitted an essay on hear earlier today and have since edited it. I was warned to stay at the 500 word limit..so I'm doing so no matter what...plus I've changed it a lot...but now it sounds sketchy...could someone PLEASE help o.o I'm starting to freak out. Thank you.
As a child, I often found myself questioning my humanity. Of course, I was human. But what did that mean exactly? What did that make me? What defines a human? As time passed, my questions only grew more fervent. It was about that stage in adolescence when I began seeking out a great deal of new media to supplement my curiosity. During that time, I discovered a television series by the name of Star Trek. Soon thereafter, I would discover what I believed to be my so sought-after answers.
An alien, a Vulcan by the name of Spock, seemed to offer me the closure that I needed. Relying time and again, upon an infallible logic, Spock proved a being far superior to any human. In fact, he hailed from an entire race based upon such cool logic, reserve and superiority. The ramification of such an unemotional state proved only to be positive. A society to function without emotion would be a society to exist without animosity or avarice. In essence, humanity could be perfect if only we, too, could exist in such a state. Since we were incapable, surely we were flawed creatures. Soon, I came to despise humanity in itself. Yes, a bit melodramatic, even ignorant. But if you'll excuse this, as I was only a child. At any rate, this mindset continued long after finishing the original Star Trek series and into the second series, the Next Generation of Star Trek. It would be from this that an entire new set of logic would be presented to me. I would discover humanity in an android.
Admittedly, I was still a cynic and when first introduced to the show, I immediately disliked the character Data. He was an android, programed for emotionless precision, and yet sought enlightenment within humanity; albeit, he was programmed in such a way. But come on! He was perfect just as he had been programmed. For what purpose would emotion serve him? Why would he wish to emulate an inferior life form? Why would a writer create such a character? I mean, obviously for irony, right? Well, at any rate, it was entirely illogical to me.
As the series continued, it became apparent to me that Data was hardly a machine, but a sentient being, sentient and superior. Data, an android fully capable of logic, in spite of his superiority, desired humanity and emotion. The two things I, a flawed human, had so scoffed at. Apparently, he was aware of something I had never been. In spite of all greatness surrounding me, all beauty within man I saw only our failures. This was my true downfall. Within humanity exists something I could never have seen, but now something I will never ignore. The inevitable flaws that define man prove also to be a catalyst for progress. Without feeling, without an illogical intuition, without error, we would have nothing to prove, save simple logic. It is only with humanity that we may ever dream, ever grow.
Newly revised commonapp essay choice 4 Due tonight!
Okay, so I submitted an essay on hear earlier today and have since edited it. I was warned to stay at the 500 word limit..so I'm doing so no matter what...plus I've changed it a lot...but now it sounds sketchy...could someone PLEASE help o.o I'm starting to freak out. Thank you.
As a child, I often found myself questioning my humanity. Of course, I was human. But what did that mean exactly? What did that make me? What defines a human? As time passed, my questions only grew more fervent. It was about that stage in adolescence when I began seeking out a great deal of new media to supplement my curiosity. During that time, I discovered a television series by the name of Star Trek. Soon thereafter, I would discover what I believed to be my so sought-after answers.
An alien, a Vulcan by the name of Spock, seemed to offer me the closure that I needed. Relying time and again, upon an infallible logic, Spock proved a being far superior to any human. In fact, he hailed from an entire race based upon such cool logic, reserve and superiority. The ramification of such an unemotional state proved only to be positive. A society to function without emotion would be a society to exist without animosity or avarice. In essence, humanity could be perfect if only we, too, could exist in such a state. Since we were incapable, surely we were flawed creatures. Soon, I came to despise humanity in itself. Yes, a bit melodramatic, even ignorant. But if you'll excuse this, as I was only a child. At any rate, this mindset continued long after finishing the original Star Trek series and into the second series, the Next Generation of Star Trek. It would be from this that an entire new set of logic would be presented to me. I would discover humanity in an android.
Admittedly, I was still a cynic and when first introduced to the show, I immediately disliked the character Data. He was an android, programed for emotionless precision, and yet sought enlightenment within humanity; albeit, he was programmed in such a way. But come on! He was perfect just as he had been programmed. For what purpose would emotion serve him? Why would he wish to emulate an inferior life form? Why would a writer create such a character? I mean, obviously for irony, right? Well, at any rate, it was entirely illogical to me.
As the series continued, it became apparent to me that Data was hardly a machine, but a sentient being, sentient and superior. Data, an android fully capable of logic, in spite of his superiority, desired humanity and emotion. The two things I, a flawed human, had so scoffed at. Apparently, he was aware of something I had never been. In spite of all greatness surrounding me, all beauty within man I saw only our failures. This was my true downfall. Within humanity exists something I could never have seen, but now something I will never ignore. The inevitable flaws that define man prove also to be a catalyst for progress. Without feeling, without an illogical intuition, without error, we would have nothing to prove, save simple logic. It is only with humanity that we may ever dream, ever grow.
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / My Struggle with Autism -- Common App [8]
You asked for me to talk about your personal style? I think it's really well written. I like your personal style and voice throughout.
You asked for me to talk about your personal style? I think it's really well written. I like your personal style and voice throughout.
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
Thank you. I shall help you! ^.^
Thank you. I shall help you! ^.^
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
Is there anything else I can do?
Is there anything else I can do?
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'All I know is That I Know Nothing' - Cornell - Engineering essay [7]
I don't know...it's just the way that one sentence read. when you get to ", did I realize..." The way the sentence is formed...it just reads odd. You could try "that I realized"
Any other way I could help?
I don't know...it's just the way that one sentence read. when you get to ", did I realize..." The way the sentence is formed...it just reads odd. You could try "that I realized"
Any other way I could help?
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
Alrighty.
I did. ^.^ I though it was really well written, just a few minor errors.
and thank you!!
Alrighty.
I did. ^.^ I though it was really well written, just a few minor errors.
and thank you!!
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'All I know is That I Know Nothing' - Cornell - Engineering essay [7]
I remember when I was little and saw my dad using a computer for the first time, I was fascinated by the thing. I remember asking my dad," How is it that you just press this here and something awesome happens in there?"
Every time I would use a computer, I would wonder about what really happened inside. The CPU was like a box of wonder. You plug it in and watch the magic happen. It was only recently when we started studying semiconductor devices in class, did I realize that it really was more complex that I ever imagined it to be! kind of awkward
And the more I studied, the more fascinated I became! As the saying goes, "The more you know, the more you realize how much you don't know," I am fascinated by the infinite scope and wide range of opportunities to make new designs and improve upon existing ones. nicely written
And my curiosity and interest doesn't end with computers. As is common knowledge, the world faces a massive energy crisis in the near future due to quick disappearance of fossil fuels. This has resulted in development of various alternate sources of energy like wind, solar, geothermal and hydro-thermal. But there is an infinite scope for new ideas. For instance, how about using sound waves to harvest energy? After all, there are massive sound vibrations on window panes in an airport. It seems such a waste to not use them.
Another idea - How about we attach a turbine to car tires to generate electricity. This would serve a dual purpose of transportation as well as an energy generator. I have many such ideas, a lot of which might be too fanciful. But as a future engineering student, I know that nothing is impossible - you just have to want it badly enough.
I believe that I am creative and innovative enough, that if given the sufficient resources and knowledge, I can achieve something special. That is what I will get at Cornell. I have heard that Cornell holds an introduction to engineering course to explore the different fields of engineering. This is exactly what I need because I am not very sure of my area of specialization. At this moment, I am inclined towards Computer Engineering, but I may find a course that interests me even more. This flexibility that Cornell offers insures that I study the subjects I am comfortable with and interested in. Furthermore, I am very enthusiastic about Cornell's Student Grant Program. As this program enables undergraduates to carry on individual research with the funding and support from the university itself, it would allow me to carry out research work in the field I choose, and give me a chance to incorporate theoretical studies into practical context.
I hope to be a part of the unique and encouraging environment at Cornell and to prove to be an asset to the university, and later mankind, so that the kids in the future have a lot more things to wonder about and appreciate.
over all, well written ^.^I'm not sure about the title
I remember when I was little and saw my dad using a computer for the first time, I was fascinated by the thing. I remember asking my dad," How is it that you just press this here and something awesome happens in there?"
Every time I would use a computer, I would wonder about what really happened inside. The CPU was like a box of wonder. You plug it in and watch the magic happen. It was only recently when we started studying semiconductor devices in class, did I realize that it really was more complex that I ever imagined it to be! kind of awkward
And the more I studied, the more fascinated I became! As the saying goes, "The more you know, the more you realize how much you don't know," I am fascinated by the infinite scope and wide range of opportunities to make new designs and improve upon existing ones. nicely written
And my curiosity and interest doesn't end with computers. As is common knowledge, the world faces a massive energy crisis in the near future due to quick disappearance of fossil fuels. This has resulted in development of various alternate sources of energy like wind, solar, geothermal and hydro-thermal. But there is an infinite scope for new ideas. For instance, how about using sound waves to harvest energy? After all, there are massive sound vibrations on window panes in an airport. It seems such a waste to not use them.
Another idea - How about we attach a turbine to car tires to generate electricity. This would serve a dual purpose of transportation as well as an energy generator. I have many such ideas, a lot of which might be too fanciful. But as a future engineering student, I know that nothing is impossible - you just have to want it badly enough.
I believe that I am creative and innovative enough, that if given the sufficient resources and knowledge, I can achieve something special. That is what I will get at Cornell. I have heard that Cornell holds an introduction to engineering course to explore the different fields of engineering. This is exactly what I need because I am not very sure of my area of specialization. At this moment, I am inclined towards Computer Engineering, but I may find a course that interests me even more. This flexibility that Cornell offers insures that I study the subjects I am comfortable with and interested in. Furthermore, I am very enthusiastic about Cornell's Student Grant Program. As this program enables undergraduates to carry on individual research with the funding and support from the university itself, it would allow me to carry out research work in the field I choose, and give me a chance to incorporate theoretical studies into practical context.
I hope to be a part of the unique and encouraging environment at Cornell and to prove to be an asset to the university, and later mankind, so that the kids in the future have a lot more things to wonder about and appreciate.
over all, well written ^.^I'm not sure about the title
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
when you say rewrite, do you mean because of the tenses?
when you say rewrite, do you mean because of the tenses?
Xanaphia
Jan 2, 2012
Undergraduate / 'under the influence of a great many characters' - Fictional character [9]
So, I picked option 4...and have been trying to think of a topic...and I did...but I had to pick two characters to best explain everything...will that be considered against the regulations or prompt? Anyway, here she is ^.^ Could you please offer any advice that you can? Also...if you're wondering why I'm so odd...just ignore it. xD Thank you for your time.
Beginning from the time of my childhood, I had always found myself under the influence of a great many characters, usually fictional. In fact, my initial point of view on myself, on humanity and on this world sprang from one of the most unusual of sources, considering that he is not even of this Earth. A Vulcan by the name of Spock would bring me to a point far greater than could ever be reached by relying upon intrinsically flawed humanity.
Spock, brilliant and collected, proved, time and again, the infallibility of his logical adherence. My admiration and aspiration reached far beyond Spock's cool logic and reserve, however. As I grew older, Vulcanism came to represent all that humanity ever could be. Truly a society to function without emotion would be a society to exist without animosity, without massacre and without avarice. Perfection could be achieved the meditation! It was perfect! Then reality dawned, this could only be achieved if we permanently alter the entirety of mankind; which, of course, would never be achieved.
My system, my methods, faulty at best, would be upheld by myself. My desire to follow an unemotional path now existed simply because I despised my own human nature. Yes, I was a bit melodramatic. But if you'll excuse this, as I was only an adolescent. At any rate, this mindset continued long after finishing the original Star Trek series. It would be until my sophomore year in high school that my realization of reality would truly be forever altered.
Still a Trekie at heart, I came across the second series, the Next Generation of Star Trek. It would be from this series that yet another fictional character would influence my disposition. I would rediscover the beauty of humanity in an android.
Admittedly, I was still a cynic and when first introduced to the show, I immediately disliked the character Data. He was an android, programed for unemotional perfection, and yet sought enlightenment in humanity; albeit, he was programmed in such a way. But come on! He was perfect just as he had been programmed. For what purpose would emotion serve him? Why would he wish to emulate an inferior life form? Why would a writer create such a character? I mean, obviously for irony, right? Well, at any rate, it was entirely illogical to me.
As the series continued, it became apparent to me that Data was no mere machine, he was a sentient being, sentient and superior being. Data was a being fully capable of logic and in spite of his superiority, he desired to be human. His actions, his words, his thoughts all derived from something I had been too stubborn to see before.
Humanity has been something I had tried to rid myself of. It was something I had scorned. In spite of all greatness surrounding me, all beauty within man I saw only our inevitable downfall. It was my inevitable downfall. This is ever apparent to me now. Within humanity is something I could never have seen, but now something I cannot ignore. Humanity is a wondrous thing because of feeling, because of imperfection. Never will I forget this.
So, I picked option 4...and have been trying to think of a topic...and I did...but I had to pick two characters to best explain everything...will that be considered against the regulations or prompt? Anyway, here she is ^.^ Could you please offer any advice that you can? Also...if you're wondering why I'm so odd...just ignore it. xD Thank you for your time.
Beginning from the time of my childhood, I had always found myself under the influence of a great many characters, usually fictional. In fact, my initial point of view on myself, on humanity and on this world sprang from one of the most unusual of sources, considering that he is not even of this Earth. A Vulcan by the name of Spock would bring me to a point far greater than could ever be reached by relying upon intrinsically flawed humanity.
Spock, brilliant and collected, proved, time and again, the infallibility of his logical adherence. My admiration and aspiration reached far beyond Spock's cool logic and reserve, however. As I grew older, Vulcanism came to represent all that humanity ever could be. Truly a society to function without emotion would be a society to exist without animosity, without massacre and without avarice. Perfection could be achieved the meditation! It was perfect! Then reality dawned, this could only be achieved if we permanently alter the entirety of mankind; which, of course, would never be achieved.
My system, my methods, faulty at best, would be upheld by myself. My desire to follow an unemotional path now existed simply because I despised my own human nature. Yes, I was a bit melodramatic. But if you'll excuse this, as I was only an adolescent. At any rate, this mindset continued long after finishing the original Star Trek series. It would be until my sophomore year in high school that my realization of reality would truly be forever altered.
Still a Trekie at heart, I came across the second series, the Next Generation of Star Trek. It would be from this series that yet another fictional character would influence my disposition. I would rediscover the beauty of humanity in an android.
Admittedly, I was still a cynic and when first introduced to the show, I immediately disliked the character Data. He was an android, programed for unemotional perfection, and yet sought enlightenment in humanity; albeit, he was programmed in such a way. But come on! He was perfect just as he had been programmed. For what purpose would emotion serve him? Why would he wish to emulate an inferior life form? Why would a writer create such a character? I mean, obviously for irony, right? Well, at any rate, it was entirely illogical to me.
As the series continued, it became apparent to me that Data was no mere machine, he was a sentient being, sentient and superior being. Data was a being fully capable of logic and in spite of his superiority, he desired to be human. His actions, his words, his thoughts all derived from something I had been too stubborn to see before.
Humanity has been something I had tried to rid myself of. It was something I had scorned. In spite of all greatness surrounding me, all beauty within man I saw only our inevitable downfall. It was my inevitable downfall. This is ever apparent to me now. Within humanity is something I could never have seen, but now something I cannot ignore. Humanity is a wondrous thing because of feeling, because of imperfection. Never will I forget this.