cutepandagirl
Nov 29, 2008
Writing Feedback / help with essay for aboard [4]
Thank you!
I revised it.
Can you give me some feedback?
I have always enjoyed new things. Like others, I believe knowledge is power. Being able to study abroad would be a great experience and a great opportunity to gain knowledge. In my future AmeriSpan experience I hope to experience numerous things.
China is one of the oldest civilizations that exist today. Beijing is the capital of China, it is a large cosmopolitan city with large population. Being able to study abroad in Beijing, China will allow me to learn many numerous old and traditional culture that China has been preserving for more than six millenniums. Studying in a different country will be an exciting adventure. Being in a new environment will make me face difficulties such as cultural differences and language barriers, but, it will allow me learn to adapt to new things, and it will make me more independent as a person.
Mandarin is spoken by more people than any other language in the world it is also one of the world's oldest languages. I'm currently taking Mandarin at my high school. Being in Beijing for four weeks will be a language immersion for me and that will be a great opportunity for me to use and practice what I've learned so far. This will let
With the numerous population in Beijing it has various ethnic groups, races and tribes. The variety of ethnic groups gives a diverse cultural ambiance in the city. For a student to go abroad it enlarges their cultural and knowledge span. A student can learn, read, and hear from a culture/place, but to live and experience it hands on beats any textbook. It is useful to experience things hands on because makes a person more open-minded and allow them to see a wider global perspective of the world.
In sum, what I hope to experience in a future AmeriSpan experience is to expand my knowledge and to enjoy an adventurous journey abroad.
Thank you!
I revised it.
Can you give me some feedback?
I have always enjoyed new things. Like others, I believe knowledge is power. Being able to study abroad would be a great experience and a great opportunity to gain knowledge. In my future AmeriSpan experience I hope to experience numerous things.
China is one of the oldest civilizations that exist today. Beijing is the capital of China, it is a large cosmopolitan city with large population. Being able to study abroad in Beijing, China will allow me to learn many numerous old and traditional culture that China has been preserving for more than six millenniums. Studying in a different country will be an exciting adventure. Being in a new environment will make me face difficulties such as cultural differences and language barriers, but, it will allow me learn to adapt to new things, and it will make me more independent as a person.
Mandarin is spoken by more people than any other language in the world it is also one of the world's oldest languages. I'm currently taking Mandarin at my high school. Being in Beijing for four weeks will be a language immersion for me and that will be a great opportunity for me to use and practice what I've learned so far. This will let
With the numerous population in Beijing it has various ethnic groups, races and tribes. The variety of ethnic groups gives a diverse cultural ambiance in the city. For a student to go abroad it enlarges their cultural and knowledge span. A student can learn, read, and hear from a culture/place, but to live and experience it hands on beats any textbook. It is useful to experience things hands on because makes a person more open-minded and allow them to see a wider global perspective of the world.
In sum, what I hope to experience in a future AmeriSpan experience is to expand my knowledge and to enjoy an adventurous journey abroad.
