Undergraduate / Common App - Person of Significance (Never hurt anyone or anything) [2]

Tell us about a person who has influenced you in a significant way. (500 words)

"Never hurt anyone or anything in any way. Animals were given life by the same Creator that created man and just as killing or hurting a person is a horrible thing, animals should be taken into the same consideration. One who kills a man has killed the whole of humankind, so imagine what harming an animal will do. This school that you will be attending is founded by contributors from all over the world. When you purposely or even accidentally damage something and do not pay it back, you will not be able to pay the thousands of contributors later. You cannot be like everyone else nor do something bad because everyone else is doing it. Many kill, many steal, and many harm others, but that does not make it right. If you damage a stop sign that the government has put up for the safety of its people and do not fix it, then you will have stolen the right of all 300 million residents of this country. Even if no one is around to penalize you for it, He, the All-Seeing, will surely see and penalize you. Maybe not in this world, but in the next, if not out of your pocket, out of your children's, if not out of theirs, out of your grandchildren's, and so on. You must make sure not to take the rights of someone else, unless it is willingly given. Even then you must ask that person to renounces his rights on it. You must be a lot more careful and respectful now. When it comes to peers, there will be ones you can not stand being away from, but there will also be those who you can not stand being with. Whether you personally like or dislike someone, you must love them because they are a creation of God; that will take away your hate. When you are angry with someone or someone is angry with you, run and hide. RUN AND HIDE! Think about what they have done to you and give them time to think.

Think if it is something that truly hurt you or something that you exaggerated? Always be the one that apologizes. Even if the person is wrong, tell them they are right and make them always feel comfortable around you. This way you will also show that you respect them. Your elders, whether one year or forty years older deserve respect. When in times of need, it is they that will help you; moreover, your consistent respect will make them more than willing to do so."

This speech, because of its delivery right before my leave from home and before my first steps towards manhood, informed me that this is what is expected of a man. I had never been given such a condensed speech, so I absorbed as much as I could. My father's speech changed my viewpoint of people, the world, and everything I have done and has made me who I am today.

I know this is a little unusual, but I thought a new strategy would turn heads.
Please check for grammar and content.

Undergraduate / Princeton - Significant Person - my mentor Mr. Mehmet Yuksel [4]

As in the archetype of a hero's journey, many accomplished individuals' lives are shaped by a mentor. Without that mentor to get him going, the hero might not become who he is destined to be. As an inexperienced and ignorant child, I have traveled down a path that led only to selfishness and self-centeredness. Through observation of my peers, I noticed that backbiting and derision flowed off tongues and backstabbing was not uncommon. I felt that I could trust no one; however, when I got to high school, I met a person that changed my perspective of the world. A math teacher, a counselor, and a mentor to all of his students, Mr. Mehmet Yuksel has influenced my life towards a brighter and better future.

Competition opens doors to great advancements but for me it was a destructive habit that led to my alienation from my friends at school. Like in middle school, I kept to my, "I will be the best," motto and when my friends noticed it, I was the target for hostility. They saw me just as I had seen them which made me think I had finally been absorbed into this horrible culture.

Then, fortuitously, I landed in a boarding school in the middle of nowhere, CT, formally known as Putnam. At first I expressed enthusiasm, hoping that this new environment would be different than my last. It was; it truly was. The problem was that I had not changed, and I desperately needed to. I started to feel the isolation in my new school too which was even worse at my new school because we lived together. I needed help changing my personality from selfish to nonchalant. Then maybe I could ease into selflessness.

When I started to try not to care who was the best or the greatest, I had a lot of difficulties. I didn't think it was possible to totally change myself. I sought help from Mr. Mehmet Yuksel, my counselor, to whom I thought I had formed a close enough bond to share these problems. His dedication to help me showed me how little I was trying and how much I needed to.

He had one-on-one talks with me about my problem and gave me invaluable tips on how to be indifferent of my status among people, which he claimed would make me among the loved within my peers. I felt obliged to try.

Eventually, I found myself very active in our school community with friends and teachers. Everyone admired my hard work especially when it was accompanied by indifference, unlike before. As I got closer to my classmates and the other students, I started to share my knowledge and I was helping them with their work.

I went from selfish to supportive within a matter of months. The transition felt a lot easier when I felt the warmth of the community I was in. I started to tutor my friends and gave help to all that asked for it, and before I knew it, I was the person I had always wanted to be. I cannot forget who helped me the most in this transformation, Mr. Mehmet Yuksel. The epitome of what I wanted to be, an altruistic teacher and friend to all.

-I know it seems I delineated from the question, but I felt that a new approach to the question was necessary. The fact that my mentor made me who I am explains that he was the cause of all of this good, I was just the effect in action. I hope those Princeton boys and girls think deep enough to see that. Merci beaucoup to all in advance:)

Undergraduate / The world is currently in a major crisis. Common App - Issue of Concern [9]

Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you. -Common App- (500 words)

Three SAT's and a few applications and essays in and I am exhausted. I keep trying to believe that I can make the deadline but just that absorbs all my energy and leaves none for the processes themselves. Games seem more and more amusing, but I still want to go to a top quality university. The battle rages on between the loss and the maintenance of it: hope.

The world is currently in a major crisis. Although many might automatically think the economy, I feel that the true crisis at hand is a loss in hope. Because of our hopelessness, we continually fall towards failure. Global warming is also another crisis that brings doom to mind; however, it is due to a feeling of hopelessness among people that nothing absolute is done towards a greener world. If those that truly seek the root of a problem search hard enough, they too will come to the same conclusion. We must subdue this feeling and try hard to work toward our goals.

As I started my senior year in high school, I felt no pressure and was carefree. I knew an impending SAT was coming up but did not think too much about it to keep from accumulating stress. I was also hopeful and felt I would do very well on it. My hope of a good result earned me a 220 point stride.

We started two AP courses for the first time in our school and I had no idea what to expect. It was very rigorous but not much from our standard curriculum. I felt I could manage these demanding courses. I started a study habit and was on my way to success.

When it came time to study for what I thought was my last SAT, maintaining a solid GPA of a 4.0 became harder and harder. I started to feel the perspiration. This was not the end; it became much more elaborate. I found out that I had to write a slew of essays for the colleges that I was applying to, not to mention the endless and confusing applications.

The Common Application was an invaluable reference until I got to the supplements. I felt as if a college needed to ask these questions, why not just do an interview? This ludicrous method of acceptance made me not want any part of it; after all, it seemed impossible. I had started to lose hope.

Just as I had lost my hope, my passionate desire to go to a top quality university motivated me to strive to accomplish the process. Just then, I realized what our problem is and how we can fix it. It may seem obvious that through motivation we can achieve our ambitions; on the other hand, it is not as plain for everyone to see. Until we open our eyes and picture ourselves where we want to be, we can not get there.

Ultimately, I feel that the lack of hope is a serious problem that the whole world faces. If I had not apprehended this philosophy, I could have neither formulated this essay nor been able to finish any of my goals. Hope is what keeps us going and that alone is what I treasure the most.

I currently have 543 words, so I need help in both brevity and grammar.
-Thanks a 1000 in advance.

Undergraduate / 'awards and accomplishments' - UPenn - Professor of Interest [8]

Hello Everyone. I am applying to UPenn (like a lot of people here) and I just wanted to here some voices other than my own.

Penn offers its undergraduates an eminent faculty and a wealth of research opportunities. Use the space below to name a Penn professor with whom you would like to study or conduct research and explain why. (It is not our expectation that you contact faculty directly to answer this question.)Please answer in the space provided. (1000 characters)

At UPenn, there are a lot of highly qualified professors from whom I look forward to learning. After some research, the professor that stood out to me the most was Dr. Edward Mansfield. I feel that he and I would have a beneficial teacher-pupil relationship because of our parallel interests of study. I believe I can benefit from his vast knowledge and he from the avid attention of an enthusiastic learner. With the worldwide economy in a quagmire, we the people, of not only the U.S., but the whole world, need qualified politicians and economists. Dr. Mansfield's extensive list of awards and accomplishments, as well as his outstanding history, leads me to believe that he is one of the best in his field and that he can help me become an effectual and qualified leader that we sorely need. The longevity of his presence at UPenn for his Bachelor's, Master's, and Doctorate Degrees also tells me that he is an experienced UPenn faculty member that will be a mentor that I can easily approach.